What did the man with cancer say to the Holocaust survivor? "I have cancer."

Why wasn't the drunk driver arrested when he killed a man? Because he died as well.

Whats red and smells like blue paint? Nothing really

Roses are black. Violets are black. Everything is black. I'm blind.

give one word to discribe a man who has been in combat for 10 years and finnaly gets home to his family and he chokes and dies on piece of brockly. Irony

you thought i was going to write a joke.. bitch

roses are red, violets are blue.

Q: Why can't dinosaurs talk? A: Because they are all dead.

Yo mamas so fat that she decided to get a gastric bypass to help lose the weight.

Your mama is so stupid that she thought Brendan Fraser was a good actor.

What do you call Justin Bieber having sex with a woman? Two people of the opposite gender having sex.

There once was a man in Peru Who dreamed he was eating his shoe He awoke with a fright In the middle of the night To find that someone was breaking into his house

why did the chicken cross the road? It is impossible to tell because we cannot communicate with chickens, but we can assume there was something of interest over there.

Why did the man follow the law? He didn't want to get arrested

Knock knock. Who's there? Your neighbour. My neighbour who? Timothy, welcome to the neighbourhood!

Moral below, I understand you are one of us, but you are not supposed to act when I, your leader is spreading the message, if you want to risk harming the fundation behind your status as a shadow and its benefits, I suggest you cease signing your comments with moral. Moral the friendly neighbourhood r*pist: "Ruining the fundation behind the life of your choosing, will always end up ruining your chance to live and act freely, if you are a true shadow, then you will follow and obey"

69

Follow the Yellow brick road, follow the yellow brick road........except it's not yellow.

Q) How do you get 100 midgets into a Mini? A)You have to manufacture a Mini large enough to accommodate 100 midgets. It wouldn't be street-legal, but at least the problem of getting 100 midgets into a Mini is solved.

why did the white man jump out of the car? because the car was crashing

how do you blindfold an asian...a piece of dental floss

what do you do when a dog bites your ear off? you see that you are bleeding then you scream.

- How breakdance was invented? - A certain black man was trying to stole rims from moving car.

Why was Timmy sad? While helping his dad hang Christmas light, he got tangled up in them and fell down. While falling he grabbed a wire, which caused a spark. This spark lit the house on fire. Since he broke most of the bones in his body from falling he could not run away. The house proceeded to collapse an poor Timmy seriously injuring and hideously disfiguring him. By the time the ambulance got there, Timmy was the only survivor for his parents died of smoke inhalation. Since he had no other living relatives he was forced to live in an orphanage for the rest of his childhood. That is why Timmy is sad.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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