I'm gay. No homo.

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A legless and armless woman is laying on the beach. A man walks by and hears her crying. "What's wrong?" asks the man. "I've never been kissed before" says the woman. So the man leans down and kisses her. The next day the man sees the woman crying at the beach again. "What's wrong this time?" asks the man. "I've never been hugged before" So the man picks up the legless and armless woman and gives her a big hug. The next day the man sees the woman still on the beach crying. "Okay now what's wrong?" asks the man. "I've never been f---ked before" says the woman. So the man picks up the woman, and has sex with her. They end up going on several dates later on and getting married at sunset on the very beach where they met.

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Roses are red Violets are blue I have Alzheimer's I have Alzheimer's

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do not read this(this is intended to be read)

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Lizzy doesnt shave or shower. She just went to the bathroom in the middle of the school hallway

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Q:Why did the chicken cross the road A:He didn't he was tortured then killed and turned into a sandwich that you can buy for the price of $1.00

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What do you call a black person flying an airplane? a pilot you racist

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Why did the wife leave her husband? Because they were having sexual differences and time restraints. The husband worked nightshifts as a nurse while the woman stayed home and took care of their child. The husband confessed he never wanted a child in the first place, and that having sexual intercourse with her didn't truly satisfy him.

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A Black Guy, A Mexican, A White guy, an Indian guy, Santa Clause and The Easter Bunny Jump off a 500 foot cliff. Which one dies? The all do. But Santa dies first because of his weight and mass.

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what rhymes with pirates? not Somalia because i don't consider a inflatable boat a pirate ship.

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Your momma's so dumb, she had to spend an extra hour studying for her mathematics test.

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What did the four pigs do at the farm? Roll in mud.

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i want justin beiber to release more albums so that i can not buy them

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Man 1: HEY DUDE! Man 2: Go shoot yourself

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(Family sat down at table) *Child goes to start a story* - "I have a ginger friend.." Everyone bursts out laughing and leaves the child confused.

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Knock Knock Who's there? Luke Futie

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Chicken

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Why did the man not go to church? He was an atheist.

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woman's rights

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Why didn't the poor man buy a candy bar? He wasn't hungry.

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What do you call a dancing panda bear? I'm not sure, but panda bears are pretty big, so the possibility of them dancing is highly unlikely.

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what can't you see but stalks you all day and night? ME!!!

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What's green and has wheels? PAIN!!! I lied about the green and the wheels.

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What did the crippled Nazi say to the Jew? Get in the train.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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