What happens when you put a squid in the microwave? It dies.

Why was the teacher laying on the floor? Because shes dead...

What's the worst part about seeing a dead baby on the beach? The crushing sadness.

Wanna hear a dirty joke? If so, you're probably a pervert.

Q: What is the difference between a tree and a women? A: your mom

Yo mamma so fat, she probably has Type Two Diabetes - which is often associated with obesity - and should seek medical advice.

A man violently rapes a small child. Unfortunately the child has aids and gives them to the man.

Why did the man fall off the swing? he got hit in the back of the head with a shovel.

Why did the monkey fall out of the tree? Because it was dead.

what's red and green and goes 100 mph? a red and green car going over the speed limit.

Why did the man pick the flower? Because he didn't like flowers.

Q: What is your name? A: I don't know.

How do you make a clown sad? Kill his family.

Have you seen Stevie Wonder lately? No? Neither has he.

Jim: Can you shoot a basketball with one hand? Moe: There's no such thing as a basketball with one hand.

Ever heard of a funny black guy? Me either

agp

who is still together after all the crap they have been through? your butt cheeks

Justin Bieber walks into a Gay-Bar. He is then kindly escorted out because he is underage. Also, because the patrons gave him certain looks that brought concern to the heterosexual bartender.

What's the square root of four? Two.

Why was the baby crying? It wasn't it got hit by a bus and died.

Why does a squid have 8 legs? It doesn't, it has 8 tentacles!

Why did the man start crying? Because he lost his job.

Knock Knock Who's there? It's me Ok, come in (the knockers voice was familiar enough that giving a name would have been out of place)

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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