Yo mama so fat, she was accepted to a clinical trial for treatment of morbid obesity in middle-aged women.

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What did the little orphan boy get for Christmas? Nothing because he had died six months prior to Christmas due to the horrible living conditions of the orphanage.

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What's white and sticky? Glue.

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What's the difference between a monkey wrench and a snow cone? A lot.

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A black walks into a Kentucky Fried Chicken. He was a customer.

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BALL SO HARD... That I got kicked off the team for intentionally fouling other players whenever I got on the court, I'm sorry

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What do you call a chicken with it's head chopped off. A decapitated chicken.

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You should really respect vegetables more. They rock. They're all like... AAAHH!!!... and I'm all like... DUDE! THAT'S SO INCREDIBLY RANDOM!... and seriously, you should respect da veggies!

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Racial Equality.

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Magic is another word for "poorly perceived analysis of the mechanics of this complex instrumentality we call optical illusion."

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Why didn't the boy get any presents for christmas? There is no Santa Claus.

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How do you know that god was a male? You don't, that's why it's called faith.

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What has wheels and spins round and round? A dog in a wheelchair.

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So I was making this glass of milk right? So I get the milk out. And I get the soup out.. then I go...wait a minute...where'd the glass of soup come into this glass of situations? *smile+awkard pause because nobody will laugh at this=Success of this anti joke...try it*

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What did the cat say to another ? meow

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What's tastier than a dead baby? An orphaned dead baby.

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Why did nick and tyler visit anti-joke.com? Because they have nothing better to do.

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How do you make a clown cry? Kill his wife and kids.

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Justin Littleton's mom accidentally texting him about buying weed, and then offering to buy him ice cream to make up for it.

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Who lives in a pineapple under the sea? Nobody, because first, pineapples are too small to fit in, and second, you would drown.

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A Jew, a Christian and a Muslim walk into a bar. I don't know what happens next, I got the fuck out of there before shit went down

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Why did the disabled man fall of the swing, someone shot him.

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LeBron James hits a game winning three with time running out in the Finals.

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Why i Hate people. They are alive. The are breathing. The are near me.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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