What is worse than the Holocaust? a Michael Bay movie

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A man goes to his drug dealer to buy Meth, there is no joke here, he is addicted to meth.

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Have you seen Stevie Wonder lately? No? Neither has he.

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What do you Call L.L. Cool J's mexican cousin? El El Bean

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What did the priest say to the rabbi ? I'm gay.

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Wanna hear a dirty joke? If so, you're probably a pervert.

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What's the difference between a hooker and an onion? The hooker is a human being whereas the onion is a vegetable.

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What's the square root of four? Two.

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What has 142 teeth and can hold back the hulk? My zipper.

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Why did the monkey fall out of the tree? Because it was dead.

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What did the homeless child get for Christmas? Leukemia

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Why does my ass hurt I played gmod with a blackpeople

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Why did Charlie Sheen laugh at the TV? Because there happened to be a comedy on.

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My mumma your mumma live down the street 18,19 marble street out came you and out came me but then your mumma died from her pee

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What did the blind kid get for Christmas? A collection of braile children's reading books.

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What happens when you put a squid in the microwave? It dies.

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What did one muffin say to the other muffin? Nothing, muffins are inanimate objects and can therefore not speak.

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Why does a squid have 8 legs? It doesn't, it has 8 tentacles!

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What Does Alex J Simpsons Face have in Common with his hand? Spaghetti

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Why did the man start crying? Because he lost his job.

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A cruise ship took sail. It was about a mile out into the water already. The blonde had missed the ship when it set sail. She was only capable of swimming a mile. She swam a half a mile out after the ship, and then turned around. She then later died due to a severe case of hypothermia due to the temperatures of the water for long periods of time.

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An Englishman, and Irishman and a Scotsman are on a plane. The plan is carrying too much weight, and is destined to crash. They drop the luggage, but there is still too much weight on board. They drop the secondary engine, but there is still too much weight. All three men then jump out. The plane crashes anyway.

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what's red and green and goes 100 mph? a red and green car going over the speed limit.

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I'm the rubber and you're the glue, whatever you say sends vibrations through the air that hit my eardrum and my brain interprets these vibrations as what your are saying.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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