What is Justin Bieber + One less lonely girl. A BABY

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Why was the teacher laying on the floor? Because shes dead...

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A man is in a bar with a drink A lorry driver come in a gulp the guys drink down The man starts crying the lorry driver says"don't cry I will buy you another" The guy says "it's not that: Today I woke up late for work and when I finally got there my boss fired me so I get in my car to go home and it wont start so I walk home while it's raining and when I got in I found that my wife was sleeping with the gardener so I came down here and asked for some poison and you went and drank it"

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So Doc... Do I have H.I.V or not? Well... Lets just say you should think positive now... NO! I CANNOT LIVE LIKE THIS *Jumps out window* ...Because the results might not appear correctl... OH you do not have... Where did you go? Phew, Good thing it was first floor! Dont be silly, you dont have an immune system which means you have full blown AIDS

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Why did the chicken cross the road? It didn't a drunk driver went off the street and hit the chicken and killed it on impact.

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Why didn't Joe's toaster work anymore? Because he dropped it into the bathtub with him.

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One white male lives in a city with all blacks. He puts up with gang violence nearly every day.

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In Soviet Russia, You drive the car, fill it up with gas and park it Just like in America

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A Brunette walks in to the docters office and says" Docter it hurts when i poke my self." She then pokes her arm and screams in agony. Then She pokes her leg and screams in agony. The Docter says "Are you really a brunette'' She replys "no im a Blonde." Docter says " oh then you have broken your finger"

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Why did a young boy fall off a building? Gravity.

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Ever heard of a funny black guy? Me either

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Why was the bear gay. He grew up in a disfunctional home.

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What did the Buddhist say to the hot dog vendor? I don't eat hot dogs. Thank you though.

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Yo mama so stupid she tried to drown a dog and was quite successful at it. Know she serves a death sentence.

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In an alternate universe, Jake Sulley's brother did not die. The human race proceeded to strip-mine Pandora of all its mineral wealth, and slaughtered the entire indigenous population.

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Why did the monkey fall out of the tree? - It was dead.

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Where do you find a dog with no legs? Wherever you left it

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A man walks into a bar, has a few drinks and spots a nice looking lady He then follows her home and molestes her child.

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How do you make a Trucker cry? Kill his family and chop of his arms.

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Knock Knock Who's there? It's me Ok, come in (the knockers voice was familiar enough that giving a name would have been out of place)

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Who let the dogs out? The pet shop.

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Why did the man fall off the swing? he got hit in the back of the head with a shovel.

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Knock knock Who's There? Idk, who the **** names their kid There?

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Yo momma is SO black.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops