Yo mama's house is so small that she had to get a better job in order to buy a bigger one.

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Police say's 'have you been drinking' and you reply back saying 'YES' then the police brings out the blower and you blow, it says on it that you are fine, but then the cops ask you 'what did you drink' and you just say 'well i drank juice for breakfast then had some water, tea, coffee' the cops get really angry but before he says anything you say that ' I AM MUSLIM'

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how do you make old people hate eachother? put them in a night time psychology class

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I was visiting my grandad the other day and my phone died, I was really bored, he told me I rely too much on technology I replied with 'no you do' and Unplugged his life support

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Why did the man climb the mountain? Because he lacked excitement in his life.

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What's worse than the holocaust? Finding a worm in your apple.

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What's the difference between jelly and jam? Jelly is made from the juice of the fruit while jam is made from the pulp of the fruit.

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ROSES ARE RED WATCHES ARE GOLD GET ON YOUR KNEES AND DO WHAT YOUR TOLD

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A plane full of atheists, with one Christian, crashes into a field over Ohio. Everybody but the Christian dies upon impact. Amazed, a news reporter on the scene of the crash, asks the man, "How did you suvive this tragic event?" "I had a parachute." Responds the man.

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roses are red violets are blue no one likes raisen bran except your mom

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A black guy walks into a dilapidated house and purchases large amounts of narcotics. Racism isn't funny.

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Spinabifita

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what do you call a black man drinking cool-aid? thirsty.

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No, we got to speak now, or you know, never.

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Why did the bus crash? Because the driver was a watermelon.

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Why was the man afraid of the pack of wolves? The man was blind and heard his stomach growling even though he had just eaten two buckets of KFC.

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What did T Pain say to the skipper of his yacht? I'm on a yacht

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What's the difference between a Lamborghini and 10 dead babies? I don't keep a Lamborghini I'm my garage

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A kid goes to Band Camp and comes back better at the Trumpet.

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what did the black guy say to his pregnant wife? im very excited to see our newborn child.

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What is 0+0? 0, I am not dumb

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How do you keep children off your front lawn? Molest them.

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What do you call a white man flying a plane? A pilot. What do you call an Arab man flying a plane? Also a pilot.

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What did the blind boy get for Christmas? The same toys from last year.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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