Why did I have sex with your mom? Because she was a beautiful individual with a fine taste in the classical arts. She also offered me a ride to her place for a delicious 3 course meal. Afterwards our romance blossomed and we decided to have sexual intercourse to show our mutual appreciation for each other.

Your momma's so broke she might be eligible for government assistance. Seriously she should totally look into it.

why did the monkey fall out of the tree? because it was DEAD!

What is yellow and has thick, shiny fur? A banana. I lied about the fur.

What did the policeman say to the chav? Dickhead!

yo mama is so old i told her to act her own age and she told me to shut up and get out of her house.

Why was six afraid of seven? Because seven had an extra penis.

How do you get four gay guys on a bar stool? With teamwork and coordination, each could place one foot on the seat, and they can all stand up using each other for balance and support. The fact that they are gay in unimportant.

person 1: Did you hear about the black man that went to college? Person 2: no i haven't Person 1: either have I What's ironic is that they are both black

A Girl Who was very close to er grandmother got a text from her mom who was very new to texting, she thought lol meant "Lots Of Love" wel it turns out the Girl's Grandmother Passed away Sunday Morning And the Mom sent the text to the girl saying " Your Grandmother Got hit by a truck and died lol" the Girl Killed Herself that night becasue Of her mom, LESSON LEARNED< LEARN HOW TO TEXT.

What did the colonel say to the soldier before he got into the army tank? Get in.

Why are black people so good at sports? They practice.

Your mother is so rotund, in fact she went to a weight loss clinic... but gained weight

roses are brown, violets are brown, who the hell sh** on my garden?

What is worse than using the toilet and then realising there's no toilet paper? A racially motivated massacre.

A man walks into a bar and the bartender says "What'll it be?" The man quietly gazes out at the other people in the bar. He continues to do this for a while, until eventually the bartender calmly taps him on the shoulder to get his attention, and the man turns to look over at him. "What can I get you today?" He asks the man. "What?" the man replies. Turns out he's deaf. Who knew?

How much wood would a woodchuck chuck if a woodchuck could chuck wood? None.

What's the difference between a duck?

What did the little boy get for Christmas? Socks.

Why did the chicken cross the road? To get to the other side.

What did the watermelon say to the apple? Nothing. Watermelons are fruits and incapable of speech.

Why did the monkey fall out of the tree He had no limbs

A:why did sam fall of the wing ? B:why ? A:she had no arms. B:... A:knock knock. B: who is there ? A:not sam

GAME OVER!!!!!! OF COURSE!!!!!! I BEHELD AS SATAN FELL FROM THE SKY..: LIKE LIGHTNIIIIIIIIIIIING! Street Fighter 2: The (antijoke) Movie. Moral: Raul Julia, you are the man, rest in peace dude you made that movie a masterpiece, do not give this a thumbs up for me, but for the most brilliant performance he ever gave.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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