Whats the difference between a bad skydiver and a bad golfer? The bad golfer looses the game, drives home, and falls asleep. The bad skydiver dies in a terrible accident.

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Whats brown and sticky A stick!!!!

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Q. Why did Mary fall down the steps? A. Because she had no legs.

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Why did everyone call the one-legged man Matt? Because that was his name.

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My life sucks, I'm about 20 years old, and i haven't changed aged for 15 years, I'm stuck in this dead end fast food job, my colleague hates me, my boss is a money crazed freak, my best friend is a mentally retarded immature weirdo and to top it all off, I live in a pineapple under the sea.

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F: what is BLUE and has 400 whells ? Q: NOTHING !!!

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tobi is so gay that he is the mayor of sanfrancisco

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Knock Knock. Who's there? Little old lady. Little old lady who? Little old lady who got hit by a bus.

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Knock knock. Who's there? Apple. Apple who? Apple juice.

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What do you call a highschooler who smokes weed, shops at the mall, and has date-raped one girl so far? Popular.

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Chuck Norris doesn't answer the phone - he doesn't have one at the moment

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Why did the baby cross the road? It's abusive father punted it.

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What happened to Johnny when he fell of his bike? He had a seizure, went into a coma, and forced his parents to take him off life support. Happy birthday Johnny.

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I dont know, are you a tomato?

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Knock knock Who's there The police "people began to jump out the back window"

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How do you make a Plumber cry? Kill his family.

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Why does Deb wear a hat? Because she is actually bald.

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A pedophile walks into a Nursery. He get's arrested.

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What is the difference between a baby and a tampon? A tampon doesn't cry when it's hungry or tired.

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why did the chicken cross the road it was being chased by the man from the chicken slaughter house.

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Nippies

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A white police officer pulled over a black guy on the highway. The cop asked him for license and registration. The black guy had a tail light out, and was very polite and cooperative. The two became close friends, but then one night, the black guy went to the house of the white cop. The black guy brought his wife and daughter over for a dinner party, eating grilled turkey sandwiches with mayonnaise. When the cop's attractive wife asked the black guy if he would like some fresh watermelon from the patch in their back yard, he respectfully declined, for he needed to return to his own home to patiently wait for a business call from one of his employees, who was also a very intelligent and hard working African male. Once home, the black guy turned on his stereo, to listen to some calming country music at an appropriately low level of volume, as his daughter and wife had gone to sleep, for the wife also had work in the morning, at her law firm, and her daughter had a job interview after her day of classes at Dartmouth were out for the day... then Martin Luther King Jr. woke up from his dream, and was soon thereafter assassinated.

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What's funny? At the exact moment you read this, someone is suffering from domestic abuse.

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Christopher Reeve walks into a room.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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