why did the dog jump into the pool? because the cat was chasing him

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That is so sweet of you, for a moment I thought I had said something that might have insulted you, but then again, considering the length of the message I see why it took so long.

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What's red and bad for your teeth? A brick

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Why did the chicken cross the road? It didn't

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A dog is walking down the street. The dog catcher promptly arrives and takes him to the pound. Two months later the dog is in a new, happy home with a wonderful family.

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What's the most racist thing ever... Manhattan

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Why did the audience laugh at Chaz Bono? Because he told a funny joke.

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What did Hellen Keller call her dog? Kamikaze-go, because he was an Akita from Japan and that was his name.

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How much wood would a woodchuck chuck if a woodchuck could chuck would? Probably a lot of wood.

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What do you call a dead prostitute? - You (or friends name) in 10 years

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What is another word for a woman that ends in unt. Aunt.

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Yo mamas so stupid that she received slightly below average in her latest maths test

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Your mom's so hairy, she should go to the barber!

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What's black and has been free since the 1700's? What? I don't know, i was asking you.

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How did the snail travel around the world without any help from a transportation device? Sadly, it didn't. The snail is incapable of this kind of long distance travel due to it's small size, lack of speed and short lifespan.

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It's weird how two of the SAME jokes can get different ratings.

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What did the house do when it came alive? It went home

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What do you get when you cross a donkey and a horse? a mule

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A scotsmen, an Irishman and an Englishman all walk into a bar. The publican had accidentally left the door unlocked and the bar was in fact closed. So they left.

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"KNOCK KNOCK". I opened the door to greet my guests for the party.

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Hey i just met you and this is crazy, but heres my penis, so suck it baby.

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roses are red violets are blue im in class

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What is sad about a kid dying in a bus accident? The other 20 survived

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A horse walks into a bar. The bartender asks "Why the long face?". The horse does not respond because it is a horse thus lacking cognitive capacity to speak nor understand English. It is confused by its surroundings and promptly shits on the floor then gallops out of the bar, knocking over a few tables.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops