A priest, a rabbi, and a whale sit down at a bar. The priest says to the bartender, "Jesus Christ is our savior." The rabbi responds, "No. Our savior has not yet been born." To which the whale adds, "MMMUUURRRAAAAAAOOOUUU!!!"

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What's the only thing better than winning a gold medal at the Special Olympics? Not being retarded.

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im black

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Q: Why did the bird fall out of the tree? A: It was dead Q: Why did the monkey fall out of the tree? A: It was stapled to the bird

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what did the smoker say to the doctor? nothing she died of lung cancer.

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GAME OVER!!!!!! OF COURSE!!!!!! I BEHELD AS SATAN FELL FROM THE SKY..: LIKE LIGHTNIIIIIIIIIIIING! Street Fighter 2: The (antijoke) Movie. Moral: Raul Julia, you are the man, rest in peace dude you made that movie a masterpiece, do not give this a thumbs up for me, but for the most brilliant performance he ever gave.

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How do you know it's a Mexican's birthday? They bring cupcakes to school for your entire class to enjoy.

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What do nappies and politicians have in common? Not a lot, although President Roosevelt suffered from incontinence due to polio as a child.

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A woman should not be in the kitchen.

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What happened when a man drove up to an escort and said "want to check my bags?" The escort replied "Certainly, sir" due to the fact the escort worked at a hotel.

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Knock knock. Who's there? Banana. Oh, then I'm not opening the door.

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-What do you call the brown spots in your yard? Dog shit.

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Stop being a centipede

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Why can't Hank drive? Hank is a stone.

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If a tree falls in a neigheorohood lots of people hear it.

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What do blacks and the night have in common? Their both worse than when it's light

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Roses are red Violets are red Tulips are red Bushes are red Trees are red HOLY SHIT MY GARDEN's ON FIRE!!!!!

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Your mom's so hairy, she should go to the barber!

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What's big,long,and mostly men use it? A submarine

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Q: Why did Sally not like her trip to Hawaii? A: A volcano erupted and killed her whole family.

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How are Steve Jobs and The iPhone the same? They got progressively thinner over time.

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Why did the chicken cross the road? Because 7 ate 9.

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Botanically speaking, cheese can't fry bagels.

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Knock, Knock Who's there? Minecraft!

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops