Womens Rights.

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Why did the monkey fall out of the tree? It was dead. Why did the second monkey fall out of the tree? It was stapled to the first one. Why did the third monkey fall out of the tree? Peer pressure.

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What's black and twelve inches long? A Maglite.

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How did the boy cross the road? He didn't he had polio.

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Johnny Manziel is the best quarterback ever (this isn't a joke only a true statement)(this is a remake of a previous joke)

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What do you call a pig with one eye? A pig.

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What did the Pope say to the little boy? Look both ways before crossing the street

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How many hours of sleep did Jimmy get last night? Zero, because he has insomnia. Jimmy got fired from his job today because of his lack of energy and motivation due to his disorder. His wife divorced Jimmy because he can no longer support her and their two kids.

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What do you call George Mills? A very kind, sensitive person with a poor music taste.

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Man who wrote "The Hokey Pokey" died. Hard part was getting him into the coffin. They put his left leg in and then the trouble started..

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What's large, green, and pissed off? The dumpster out back

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Paul howley can't drive, phahahaha

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Roses are red Bacon is too Rhyming is hard bacon

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What happens when you shoot a priest in the heart? He dies.

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terry stockton is straight

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whats funnier than hugos penis? Nothing!!!!

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Why could the red-haired boy sing higher notes than the blonde-haired boy? He was castrated at birth.

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vagina, hehehehehehehe

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What's brown and sticky? Poo.

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How did you feel after smoking that joint? I felt like going to pass out And then? I passed out

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what do you call a cow with no legs? ground beef

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If the red house is made out of red bricks, the yellow house is made out of yellow bricks, and the blue house is made out of blue bricks, what is the greenhouse made of? Ah, I see what you did there. You are expecting me to follow the sequence based on how each house is made out of bricks the same color as their title. However, I am one step ahead of you and I know that the greenhouse is made out of glass panels. But what if it were made out of green glass panels? Then, I suppose, the sequence could continue naturally yet we still have a problem of units - bricks vs. glass. Quite the dilemma we are facing.

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What did the college student say after he failed his test? He didn't say anything, he was a mute.

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Chinese drivers.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

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