Why can't Hellen Keller drive? Because she's dead.

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what's the difference between fulham and sunderland ? hugh grant and lilly allen's dad

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Q. Why did Mary fall down the steps? A. Because she had no legs.

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Why did George ride his bike to the park? Due to the down economy his parents were forced to sell his bike in order to pay their bills.

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Whats yellow pink and blue and if it fell out of a tree it would kill you? Oh were you expecting an answer here, if i knew the answer i wouldn't have asked a question.

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I went to the game and saw a Mexican wave. So I waved back at him.

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Why did the boy have sex with his grandpa? His grandpa is a nice guy and it was his birthday.

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An Irishman walks into a bar. He orders whiskey. An American enters the same bar. He orders a beer. A blonde Frenchwoman enters the same bar. She says "Gimme whatever the Irisman ordered! Double it! He's cool!" She started talking to the American

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What do a woman and a female dog have in common? They were both annoying so I put them down.

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A white straight man, a black gay man, and an Asian bisexual woman walk into a bar. They are enjoying their drinks until one overly intoxicated man makes a remark towards the group in reference to their diversity in race, sexual orientation, and sex. The bar crowd is enthused with the drunk man's genius in not only constructing a joke to cover all three categorical descriptions of the group, but in guessing each member's sexuality based on their respective appearances.

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A poor woodcutter accidentally dropped his axe into the nearby river when taking a particularly forceful swipe at the tree he was cutting. He felt so dejected he wept. Then, the goddess of the river appeared. "What ails thee, my dear man?" she asked. "My axe -- it fell in the river!" stuttered the weeping woodcutter. "Do not worryI am the goddess of this river, and will find your axe!" said the River Goddess and dived into the river. After waiting eagerly for several minutes, the woodcutter was resigned to the fact that he had imagined the River Goddess.

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There was a man who entered a local paper's pun contest. He sent in ten different puns hoping at least one of the puns would win but, unfortunately, the highest he placed was 4th.

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Knock Knock. Who's there? Little old lady. Little old lady who? Little old lady who got hit by a bus.

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Want to hear a joke? Womens' Rights

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What's worse than finding a worm in Your apple?? A pile of dead babies

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A panda bear walks into a bar. The bartender then alerts the zoo of the whereabouts of their missing panda.

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Why did the Filipino man get small condoms? Because he's not black.

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F: what is BLUE and has 400 whells ? Q: NOTHING !!!

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Knock knock Who's there? A pedofile, get in the van Ok

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Why did brad pay the sexy looking librarian with a big smile on his face? Becouse brad returned his books to late and had to pay a fine for that. The librarian made a joke about the fact that it was a waste of money to return the books late.

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Roses are red, Violets are blue. I have Tourette's, Cheese on toast.

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Why was 6 afraid of 7 ? Cause 7 was a petophile and 6 has four children

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Why'd the man go to jail? Because he had a piece of cheese.

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guess what my nephew said today? oh ya i forgot, hes dead..

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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