"Did you eat your veggies?" asked the shark, sarcastically.

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what happens when 15 babies cross the street? well, some may be hit by cars. others will have to face the harsh life of reality.

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A baby crawls into an abortion clinic.

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What's the difference between a Jew and a Boy Scout? A Boy Scout comes home from camp.

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What did the boy with no arms and no legs get for Christmas? A bicycle.

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What happened to the black man when he was eating a Tootsie Roll? He ate the entire thing but was still hungry due to the empty calories.

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Whats your name? Bill. I have a son named Kevin.

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What's worse than having a worm in your apple? The Holocaust.

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Why is Helen Keller a bad driver? Because her inability to see or hear made her an extremely dangerous road hazard.

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Why did the boy lose his watch? Who cares? It was a shitty-ass watch.

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A momma cow was grazing in the meadow with her three calves when the first one asked, "Mom, how did I get the name Rose? "Well when you were born, a rose pedal came floating in the breeze and landed on your head." The second calf asked, "How did I get the name Daisy?" "Well when you were born, a daisy came floating in the breeze and landed on your head." The third calf mumbled, "LKJLSKJFSLKJLKSJDF" incoherently, and the Mom responded, "Shut up, Cinderblock."

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Why did the man tell the other man to shut up? The other man said something that made the man who said shut up mad so he told the man to shut up.

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Knock Knock whose there your biological parents REALLY No

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What is the best place to get watermelons and fried chicken? A Watermelon grove and a popeyes and/or KFC

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A black and a mexican jump off a building, What a tragedy...

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Knock Knock Who's There? Your Best friend. Did you forget what I looked like?

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Why do we need to keep answering encryption codes? Because you can't keep a good Jew down (Wyndellberg)

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no pen = no studying no studying = bad grades bad grades = no job no job = no money no money = no food no food = death DON'T LOSE YOUR PEN

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What do you call a man who eats a swordfish at 11 o'clock? Dead by midnight.

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Knock knock. Whos there? The police, your wife is dead. The police, your wife is dead who? Sir, this isn't a joke.

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Why did the chiken cross the road? Well its wing were clipped so it couldnt fly across the road.

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How do you kill a mocking bird? You throw an axe at it.

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Your maternal figure contains so many Triglycerides, her belt size is greater than or equal to the circumference of the Earth.

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How many Alzheimer patients does it take to change a light bulb? To get to the other side!

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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