Two men are sitting on a park bench discussing the anatomy of goats. Where is Bertha? Teaching the principals of mathematics to blind orphins in Moscow, Russia.

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A very unattractive girl bent over in front of me. I proceeded to be sick, and then I choked on my sick. I died. My family mourn my death every day.

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How many anti-jokes does it take to change a light bulb? Since anti-jokes are not concrete objects, any change would have to occur metaphorically or abstractly. The number of anti-jokes required would then be irrelevant.

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Why is the guy fat? Because he eats too much.

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Q:whats yellow and flys through walls A:A magical Banana

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What time is it when an elephant sits on your car? 12:00

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Knock knock. Who's there? the police.

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What's the difference between an elephant and a toaster. A lot of things.

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What is funnier than a barrel full of clowns? The holocaust.

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Why was the little boy crying? He had a frog stapled to his face.

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two guys walk into a bar. the third guy ducks

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Q: What's the difference between a Ferrari and a pile of dead babies? A: I don't have a Ferrari in my garage.

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Haikus are useful Actually they are not.... ....I am so sorry

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Knock Knock Who's There Santa Santa Who? I stole your dog.

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How did the mermaid break her arm? She fell out of a tree.

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why hppened when the little boy failed his math test? He cut off his penis, shaved his head and hung himself

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Why did the man have an erection? He had just masturbated.

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why did the dog chase it's tail? it has a case of OCD where he was obsessed with catching his tail and would spin until he passed out or threw up.

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Why did little Suzy fall off the swing? She didn't have arms. Knock knock Who's there? Not Suzy.

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What happened when the teacher told the class to be quite? The class was quite.

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-_- i like trains ... -_-

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Shoulda had a V8 ...or not because I am severely allergic to tomato's.

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Whats the difference between a pontiac and a pile of dead babies? I dont have a pontiac in my garage.

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A man walks into a bar. The ceiling was ringed with dozens of TV’s, much like your average sports bar. Unlike your average sports bar however, the TV’s were not featuring athletic competition. That is unless you consider vigorous and explicit gay sex between men hung like Tijuana mules to be a sport.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

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