What's worse than getting kicked by a horse? Drowning.

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two goldfish are in a tank they swim around happily and have no consciousness of what is happening because of their short memory.

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What do a fish and a car have in common? They are both edible.

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Two muffins are sitting in an oven. They are both eaten fifteen minutes later.

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Why did the girl throw butter out the window? She was suffering from an epileptic seizure.

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How many footballs fit in a glass of liquid. none, this football is HUGE!!!

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Ever heard of a funny black guy? Me either

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How do you make an eggroll? You push it.

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Why didn't the man eat the carrots? Because he was a vegetarian.

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Why did the chicken cross the road? It didn't a drunk driver went off the street and hit the chicken and killed it on impact.

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Why do chinese firefighters wear white belts in their firefighting uniforms? So the their pants stay up.

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A black man, a Jew and a Hispanic man walk into a bar and the bartender says "Hello. What could I get for you?" The black man had a Manhattan. The Hispanic man had a Bloody Mary. The Jew merely had water, as his religion forbids alcohol. The trio enjoy their drinks and then exit the establishment.

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Want to hear the best joke ever? Me too.

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what is purple and hairy like a bear? A purple bear

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What did jell say to the carriage driver from Uzbekistan that was underpaid and had no banter? Oh My God ROFLMAOOTG (the last three are "on the ground") "I will beat you with a small child that I will soon feed to the T-Rex's" should be on the list.

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What's blue and has two windows ? The sky, i lied about the windows.

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What did the mime say when he met the clown. Nothing.

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You are so gay you frequently, and consentingly are sodomized by men and frivolously enjoy it.

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Why didn't Joe's toaster work anymore? Because he dropped it into the bathtub with him.

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Knock knock. Who's there? I'm insecure about my body.

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hi

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What would you get if I your donkey ate my chickens legs? A court order to have them seperated.

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Im ashamed of being from Canada

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What is Justin Bieber + One less lonely girl. A BABY

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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