Sidney Crosby comes face-to-face with Alex Ovechkin. The Penguins were playing the Capitals.

thumb_up thumb_down +23

How do you give Salley enough energy swim against the river current? Add your own electric current.

thumb_up thumb_down +23

what happened to the black guy after he turned off the light? he probably wanted to save energy, so he moved to a different room with natural sunlight as a light resource.

thumb_up thumb_down +23

There's three sisters: a blonde, a brunette and a redhead. They know she's not they're real mom.

thumb_up thumb_down +23

What did the milk say to the oatmeal? I came from a cow nipple.

thumb_up thumb_down +23

Why did Sally fall off the swing? Because she has no arms.

thumb_up thumb_down +23

What did the lonely old man get on valentines day? Nothing, because his wife died of cancer two years ago.

thumb_up thumb_down +23

penus

thumb_up thumb_down +23

Why did the chicken cross the road? To get to your house. Nock Nock. Whose there? The chicken.

thumb_up thumb_down +21

A blonde, a redhead, and Asian are talking. They are friends.

thumb_up thumb_down +21

What happened when the teacher told the class to be quite? The class was quite.

thumb_up thumb_down +21

Hello? Hi. Who is this? Yo mom. Your not my mom. Im the Irish man that did your mom.

thumb_up thumb_down +21

Q: Why don't people like me? A: Because I smell bad and I give off a creepy vibe

thumb_up thumb_down +21

What did the liberian man say to the kid he just spat on? You have ebola. and probably aids.

thumb_up thumb_down +21

Communism, Capitalism and an Irish man walk into a bar. Communism says, “I’ll buy the drinks but I require your complete obedient consent.” Capitalism says, “No I’ll buy the drinks but I require that you pay me back with interest” and the Irish man says “No I… I don’t feel very well at all… Oh shite I’ve got the bloody runs!” He then proceeds to shit myself.

thumb_up thumb_down +21

Miley Cyrus is Twerk Queen

thumb_up thumb_down +21

Your mother is so rotund, in fact she went to a weight loss clinic... but gained weight

thumb_up thumb_down +21

Roses are red. Violets are red. My thumb is red because I accidentally put it in the toaster.

thumb_up thumb_down +21

What do you call something that has two legs, arms and is bloody all over? My ex's new boyfriend.

thumb_up thumb_down +21

What do you call an arab flying a 747? A pilot.

thumb_up thumb_down +21

Why didn't the baby cry? It was stillborn.

thumb_up thumb_down +21

A family's house was possessed by ghosts causing them great fear and discomfort. Who are they gonna call? A real estate agent.

thumb_up thumb_down +21

how many horses does it take to piss on a cat 17 beccause rape isnt real in somalia

thumb_up thumb_down +21

What do you call a black man in an envelope? A tiny black man

thumb_up thumb_down +19

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...


Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops