What do you call a fat man in a tiny pipe? Stuck.

A black guy, an asian guy, and a white guy jump off a cliff, who lands first? Well, newton's first law states that every massive particle in the universe attracts every other massive particle with a force that is directly proportional to the product of their masses and inversely proportional to the square of the distance between them. So it depends on who weighs the most.

A paraplegic walks into a bar.

What's worse than being a jew in the holocaust Being born black

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Why is 6 scared of 9? Selena Gomez

Hey, I just met you And this is crazy I have alzheimer's Bacon

(read this aloud): A man walks into a bar with a giraffe. Him and the giraffe order multiple shots and get hammered. The giraffe on the other hand can't hold his liquor so well, and ends up passing out on the floor of the bar. The man decides to leave him there and take off. On his way out, the bartender yells, "Hey, you can't just leave that lyin' there!" and the man says, "It's not a lion, it's a giraffe!"

Geography Teacher: Bill, British Columbia agreed to join confederation when the government of Canada agreed to do what? Bill: To build a bridge to where my father is who is divorced with my mom.*tear* Geography Teacher: Is that really nesscary Bill? You have a detention.

What will you never see? A white guy that camp jump.

Jesus walks int a hotel and places a handful of nails on the counter in front of the innkeeper. He is immediately turned away as the innkeeper understandably does not accept nails as currency.

How do you make someone cry Take all of their belongings

Q: whats snoop doggs favourite weather? A: drizzle

There are two types of people in this world: those who can count and those who can't. I happen to be one of those who can.

Why didn't Lucas want to go down the slide? He was scared.

What did the prostitute say to the nun? It's nice to see you again, Sister.

I saw GESUS and SHE's BLACK

Knock Knock Who's there? ... No one, you have Schizophrenia

What do you call a Mexican that swam across the border? An illegal immigrant.

A man walks into a bar Ouch!

Whats white and can kill you if it falls out of a tree? A refridgerator

What do you get when you cross a jack-o-lantern and an antelope? Nothing. You wouldn't see an antelope by a pumpkin.

I just flew in from New York and boy are my arms tired. I was jerking off during the entire plane ride.

Why did the Monkey Fall out of the tree? ..It was dead..

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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