What's worse than getting kicked by a horse? Drowning.

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9/11

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what do you call a pig that knows karate? pork-chop!

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How do you make a Trucker cry? Kill his family and chop of his arms.

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What happened when the irishman left the bar? he didnt

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Yo momma is SO black.

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How do you call blond girl with no arms and no legs ? A victim of a tragic car accident.

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Fine, you got me there, I have already made sure that you get your compensation, it is the least thing I can do you let me know if anyone claiming to be part of my order bothers you again, I promise I will personally enforce strict guidelines in order to ensure that such a thing never happens again. I hope you will trust me, I will no longer call it the Order of Nero, but as you know we cannot reveal the true name of our order. I also agree to meet you in person so we can further discuss this impeding situation which I will give top priority. Truth is Nero, that I used to be one of your co workers in the underground, and my attempts at saving what is left might not be as ideal as the goals we are set to achieve are, we simply cannot expect that people excel at greatness at the first go. Of course this grave incident is not even near a "mere lack of greatness" but rather a group of people that yes, sadly have rightfully claimed to be members of our society, yet I need you to come to terms that this was a huge oversight in my vision for a new and "improved" underground society, and not a intentional attack at you and your personal security. I submit to your demands, and I ask that you partake in a small number of meetings where we can all discuss and further develop the necessary guidelines required to further solidify our foundation.

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Ever heard of a funny black guy? Me either

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What is green with wheels? Grass, I lied about the wheels.

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Im ashamed of being from Canada

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What's the animal that eats with its tail? All of them, since they won't take it off when they get to eat.

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Jews.

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Why didn't the man eat the carrots? Because he was a vegetarian.

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finding nemo didnt make sense how could a shark go on a no fish diet

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why did the little girl fall off the swing - she had no arms.

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Why did the the man not take acting? He wasn't good at it.

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What do you get if you cross a Black Man with a Knife? Stabbed.

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knock knock whos there not me

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Why did the chicken cross the road? I have not seen chicken since I was very young, on my parents' farm. This is before the Cossacks slaughtered them. I can still hear screams of sister as soldiers ravaged her. But back to question, where did you see chicken? I am very, very hungry.

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Women's rights.

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Why couldn't Helen Keller drive? She never got her drivers license.

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two goldfish are in a tank they swim around happily and have no consciousness of what is happening because of their short memory.

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A Mexican, and American, and a Chinese man are crossing the street. They all get hit by a car and die.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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