Why did the Asian man have a small penis? Because he was flaccid.

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What is Michael Bay's favorite fruit? Melon

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What is green with wheels? Grass, I lied about the wheels.

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Ya know how when geese fly in a V-shape, one side is longer than the other? -Yes Do you know why that is? -No Because there's more geese on that side

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why did the chicken cross the road? because he happened to cross the road

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Mary Lu was swinging on a swing * swush swush* and her mom was sweeping the porch when she sad Mary Lu go get that big fat shiny quarter on that road then Mary Lu say how about you get your self that big fat shiny quarter.! Her mom drop the broom in discussed and walkout into the road and was bout to bend down when swush a bus runs her over And Mary Lu just laughed and laughed she knew that wasn't a big fat shiny quarter it was a nickel!!!!

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Why did the chicken cross the road? It didn't, this joke sucks.

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No one walks into a bar. It is closed.

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A Mexican, and American, and a Chinese man are crossing the street. They all get hit by a car and die.

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whats arrogant, has blonde hair and belongs in the kitchen? Gordon Ramsay

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What makes Stephen Hawking such a lame scientist??? A: he has a disabling disease. It's called ALS.

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Why did the little boy drop his ice cream? A stimulus in the environment to the receptors in his fingers caused his hand to open no longer gripping the ice cream. Due to this, the ice cream fell to the ground causing a desirable mess for someone to clean up, satisfying themselves with the fact that they have considered the environment during this small ''could happen to anybody'' situation. After the messed was cleaned up, the boy's mother bought him another ice cream, in which case the boy anticipated another potential mess, and held the ice cream carefully. As he did this, he managed to finish eating the whole of the ice cream, allowing no money that was paid for the product to go to waste.

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what's worse than getting an unwarranted parking ticket? Serving a life sentence for killing the meter man.

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What do you get when you combine KIA and NOKIA? A cheap vehicle with a cheap mobile phone inside.

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How did the Jew escape being put in the gas chamber? He killed himself.

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Women's rights... Are a legitimate concern in today's society.

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Why did the chicken cross the road? Because he can't fly

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what did the muffin say to the other muffin when they were in the oven? hi, im a muffin

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Why did the girl throw butter out the window? She was suffering from an epileptic seizure.

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Why couldn't Helen Keller drive? Because she was blind and deaf.

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Mary had a little lamb. Then Died.

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How many footballs fit in a glass of liquid. none, this football is HUGE!!!

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what did the poor kid get from santa? Nothing santa hates poor kid, but the rich kid got a very nice convertable.

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Why did the doctor have no peins? She was a woman.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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