a mom tell her kid not to play with knives ten years later tells her kid not to play with knives and the kid asks y and the mom says because ur older brother killed his father and himself playing with knives so the kid said mom i promise i wont do that then kils his mom and himself

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Why Did The Girl Cry? Old People Are Funny.

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Andrew: who's better at football, Peyton Manning or Tom Brady? Thomas: ur mom

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What's the difference between a black man and a pile of shit ? One is a black man, the other is a pile of shit.

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why did the internet crash? it didn't

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i am a dwarf i have a big nose im a ranga nice to meet you julia

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Why did the goblin have no friends? because no one likes a goblin, including other goblins.

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Paperclip... BANANA?!

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"Knock Knock" "Who the hell is it?" "Patri..." "Go the hell away!"

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Why did the chicken cross the road? Because he can't fly

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Why did the girl fall off the swing? She had no arms.

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Two muffins are sitting in an oven. They are both eaten fifteen minutes later.

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Two girls are sitting quietly.

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A man walks into a bar. The bartender asks, why the long face? The man replies "i have a huge malignant tumor in my chin"

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how do you kill 1000 Ethiopians? throw a mars bar off a cliff!

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whats arrogant, has blonde hair and belongs in the kitchen? Gordon Ramsay

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Roses are red Violets are blue Some poems rhyme Others don't

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A doctor walks out of the delivery room and relieves A nervous father, telling him that his new baby girl has just been born with great health. The father sighs in relief as happiness overwhelms him. With such great news, the doctor chuckles and continues on with the rest of what he had to relay to the father. Your wife died during the delivery.

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what did the poor kid get from santa? Nothing santa hates poor kid, but the rich kid got a very nice convertable.

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I'm so hungry I could eat food

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What do you call a black man who flies a plane? A pilot.

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Why did Jim fall out of the tree? Because Jim is a leaf.

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Why couldn't Helen Keller drive? She never got her drivers license.

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What is the difference between a pizza and the Jews? The pizza doesn't scream when you put it in the oven.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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