What did the Mexican man say to the American man? Nothing. Neither of them spoke the same language.

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Five men walk into a bar. The bartender says, more taste or less? None of them care.

what do u call a gay dinosaur megasoreass

Why does Ron Weasley have friends? He does't. He's a ginger.

Roses are red, violets are blue my name is clearance, and i have to poo

Hi

What did one paper bill say to the other? Did you hear about one of us getting replaced by a woman? It's like Bruce to Caitlyn!

This guy goes to the ball game. He waits in line at the concession stand and gets a footlong hot dog and a giant orange soda. Then he makes his way around to his section of the stadium, and works his way to his seat, which is in the center of the row. Right when he's about to take a bite of his hot dog, when he hears someone in the seats way up behind him yell "Hey! Mike!" He sets down his hot dog, and sets down his giant orange drink, stands up and turns around, scanning the crowd. Eventually he sits back down. He picks up his hot dog, picks up his giant orange drink, and is just about to take a bike when he hears it again, someone way up behind him yelling "Hey! Mike!". So, he sets down his hot dog, sets down his giant orange drink, stands up, turns around, and scans the hundreds of faces in the seats behind him. After a while, he sits back down. Then, right when he's about to bite into his hot dog, he hears someone behind him yelling "Mike! Hey, Mike!" He sets down his hot dog, sets down his giant orange drink, stands up, turns around, cups his hands around his mouth and yells as loud as he can, "My name's not Mike!"

Joe Paterno doesn't walk into a police station . . .

A man buy's a new lawn mower, it breaks so he takes it back. The shopworker says that if you don't have a recipt then you cannot replace it, the man goes home and months later catch's a flu.

Why was the black man scared of the chainsaw? Because his father was killed by one when he landed on it when he fell of his ladder that was holding him up while he was cutting the limbs of a tree.

A man walks into a pet shop. He says to the shopkeeper, "Excuse me, do you have any dogs going cheap?" The shopkeeper replies "We feel that we price our animals reasonably, but the cheapest type of dog we have is £50." The man realises that, unfortunately, he cannot afford a dog. Instead he purchases a goldfish. It wasn't the same.

3 thieves are also murderers and naked at the moment.

Antijoke the book. Seriously it sucks ass, do not bother, they only included the very worst ones.

How come Emmet Till never attended college? Because he was brutally murdered.

How do you know if your friend is dead? You shoot him in the face!

How do you make a mime talk? Put a gun to his head.

What do you call a qoman with 10 kids? A mother with 10 kids

Do you know the difference between a Mexican and a bench? One is a human, and one is an inanimate object.

what happened to Timmy when he fell off his bike? CANCER.

Why did the white girl have a black friend? Because she was very welcome to different races and wanted to learn about her culture.

Why did the black man have to stand in the bus? All of the other seats were taken.

Whats the difference between a black person and dirt? nothing

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

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