What happened when john pelted susie with a rock? she had a temporary concusion, needed eight stitches and John was grounded

What's the difference between a catcher's mitt and Lou Ferrigno? If you seriously said "I don't know, what?" I suggest getting a medical examination by a professional psychologist.

whats worse then being lit on fire? dont worry about that right now your ass is on fire!

shea kisses a girl

how many mice does it take to screw in a lightbulb just 2 but it beats me how they got in there

A 12-year-old boy comes up to the Polish man and says, "I was looking in your bedroom window last night and I saw you and your wife doing it. Nyah, nyah, nyah!" The Pole answers, "You are a very rude, disrespectful, and inappropriate child. Where are your parents?"

What is grey and looks like a rock? A rock

cool story bro. tell it again. tell it at a party.

What do you call a 30 year old man with a large white van full of kids? A parent carpooling to the soccer game.

YEAH THEY DO.

What did the guy who killed Osama Bin Laden say? Burn!

What is worse then North Korea trying to blow up everybody? Peter Griffin twerking.

Why did the guy not pet the dog? He was allergic.

Chuck Norris is an average human being!

You know what's funny? A bucket full of dead babies. Do you know what's funnier? The last one is still alive and crying.

Ipod to earbuds: "hey buds" earbuds response: "sup player"

what's the difference between a white man and a black man? their skin color

Roses are black Violets are black I'm blind

What happened when the black guy looked up his family tree? He discovered long-forgotten relatives who had lived during difficult times for African-Americans in the United States and faced disenfranchisement, extrajudicial killings, and chattel slavery. His sense of racial consciousness and solidarity was thereby reinforced.

What did Joan of Arc have for her last meal? Steak

A pig, a chicken, and a cow are born on 3 separate barns. They are raised by old men who subside off the grains of the field. When the animals mature, the farmers will butcher the pig, slaughter the chicken, and gut the cow. The farmer who raised the chicken may enjoy a few eggs first but the animals will all die eventually. Either of natural causes or more likely being butchered for profit. Cows make milk.

A man attempts to sign in to PlayStation Network... And succeeds, proceeding to enjoy the console's numerous award winning exclusive titles such as LittleBigPlanet and Uncharted 2, along with utilizing the system's Blu Ray capabilities and playing with his friends online in an absolutely free network, on what many consider to be the superior console to the Xbox 360.

Why did the monkey fall out of the tree? Because it was dead. Why did the second monkey fall out of the tree? Because it was stapled to the first monkey. Why did the refrigerator fall out of the tree? Because it was a refrigerator. Why did the little girl die? Because she was hit by two monkeys and a refrigerator.

Girls

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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