Why was it sad that the kid was playing football? He had no arms and legs and he was the football.

thumb_up thumb_down +36

It was just Michael J. Fox's birthday I wonder if he got in trouble for shaking his presents.

thumb_up thumb_down +36

what do yo call two dog? dogs.

thumb_up thumb_down +36

Did you hear about the black guy who went to college? I did too, he worked hard for four years, partied in moderation, but graduated with a degree in chemical engineering and became very successful in the business world in order to support his wife and two children.

thumb_up thumb_down +36

How could problems have been avoided in the old west? Bigger towns

thumb_up thumb_down +36

Whats worse than finding a worm in your apple? -death -kidney failure -gall stones -getting in an automobile accident -getting struck by lightning -getting sodomized -embezzlement -deception -HIV/AIDS -illness of any nature -world hunger -the holocaust -Zimbabwe's economy -getting hit by a train -getting hit by a bus -the hives -getting bit by an alligator -head injuries -being arrested -childhood obesity -sexual predators -highly impoverished areas -losing a finger -getting hit with a bat -corruption -general rudeness -being lost in the woods -contracting a sexually transmitted virus -teen pregnancy -murder -rape -robbery -going blind -losing a child -falling down a well -bestiality -identity fraud -massacres -racism -genocide -mental disabilities in children -bullying -food poisoning -stepping on a nail -eugenics -the mass murder, rape, and theft of the land from the Native people of America -forced assimilation -slavery -brain deteriorating illness -matricide -prostitution - accidentally repeating yourself -prostitution -domestic violence -animal cruelty -pollution -deforestation -global warming -losing your life savings -still birth -oppressive leaders -physical conflicts -world wars and other military conflict -the situation in Rwanda -Inequality in treatment of women in middle eastern countries -auto theft -tax evasion -terrorism -being diagnosed with cancer -clinical depression -prostitution -finding two worms in your apple

thumb_up thumb_down +36

colby doesnt shave

thumb_up thumb_down +34

Q: What did the prostitute say to the other prostitute? A: I have AIDS.

thumb_up thumb_down +34

What did the computer say to the other computer? Nothing, computers can't talk

thumb_up thumb_down +34

what did the robot say to the centipede? Stop being a centipede!

thumb_up thumb_down +34

"How come dinosaurs don't talk?" " I don't know. Why?" " Because they're dead."

thumb_up thumb_down +34

69

thumb_up thumb_down +34

Shotest joke ever... Your dick.

thumb_up thumb_down +34

Kid- "Where do babies come from?" Mom- *Commits Suicide*

thumb_up thumb_down +32

Why did the bus driver get arrested? Because he hijacked the bus.

thumb_up thumb_down +32

What do you call a gay woman who likes to smoke cigarettes? A lesbian with a possible nicotine addiction.

thumb_up thumb_down +32

Q: how many oxen does it take to row up the empire state building in half of a green canoe under the purple sun while eating a dead moose with no arms? A: Purple, because snakes have no elbows.

thumb_up thumb_down +32

A doctor, a farmer, and a blonde walk into a bar. The doctor orders red wine because he knows it's good for the heart. The farmer orders a Piña Colada because he likes fruit. The two men wait eagerly to what the blonde is about to order. The blonde opens her purse and says "Damn it, I can't find my credit card." Suddenly, a handsome young gentleman walks up to her says "Don't worry miss, I'll buy a drink for you. What are you having?" The blonde looks up and says "Don't worry? I just lost my credit card!" In a fit a of anger, the blonde storms out the bar and doesn't order anything.

thumb_up thumb_down +32

Q:What did the ginger get for Christmas? A: A soul...jk,hair dye

thumb_up thumb_down +32

How do you wake up lady gaga? Set an alarm for an appropriate time

thumb_up thumb_down +32

What did they farmer say when he lost his tractor? Where is my tractor?

thumb_up thumb_down +32

How do you know if a woman is cheating on you? If you catch her cheating on you

thumb_up thumb_down +32

if life gives you lemonnde your probally halusinating

thumb_up thumb_down +32

The original "Chicken cross road" joke is a Anti joke in itself.

thumb_up thumb_down +32

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...


Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops