What did the fat guy say to the skinny guy? You're skinny

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Customer: Can I have a tin of red paint, please? Shop owner: I'm sorry sir, we only have yellow paint left. Customer: That's ok, I have my bike with me.

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If you are my friend like it!

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Why did the chicken cross the road?

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How did the boy die? Because he got molested and raped by a pedophile!

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Why did the man have trouble breathing after meeting the President? He had a collapsed lung.

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As for regarding the Win/Win/Win/sore ass kid comment below... Why not? There is too much Win in order to worry about some fucking soreass thats just gonna grow up to be a slut... RIGHT? Your friendly r*pist Neighborhood r*pist Moral: Man: "He or she who knows I am right, will be be the only one left" Btw, I am the Anti-God, what else can I be? You are the ones that killed Christ Ahahahahahaha! Political humor bonus because my satisfaction of owning you all and your entire screen. Are you Right Winged? Or wrong Winged?

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Give this a thumbs up cuz mi spelin is baad

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What's the difference between a cow and a purple sweater? They're both purple Besides the cow

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Q: What did the twin tower say to the other twin tower? A: I'm falling for you.

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What do you call a black man that sells drugs? A pharmacist.

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why did the woman cross the road? to get groceries for making more sandwiches.

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Hey youknow what's funny???? Jokes

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what's green and has wheels? grass, i lied about the wheels.

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How did the boy cross the road? He didn't he had polio.

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Womens Rights.

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How many Mexicans does it take to screw in a light-bulb? Probably one. Replacing a light-bulb is a pretty simple task which any person (regardless of ethnicity) should be able to do without assistance.

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A fish finds that his fishbowl is on fire. He escapes the bowl only to realize he is equally screwed.

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Why didn't the blonde go to the party? Her depression finally got the best of her and she shot herself

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How many cows can you fit in a field? It depends on how big your field is.

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what do you call a mixbreed of a bull dog and a shitzu? a sharpei

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What did the muffin, say to the other muffin? Nothing. Because muffin's are inanimate objects, therefore incapable of speech, or any other sentient action. They baked quietly until the man who was baking them came to the conclusion they were fit for consumption, devoured them, and went on with his day.

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Your momma's so fat: She's willing to risk kidney damage and embarrassing flatulence by undertaking the atkins diet.

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what is white and black and red all over? a half eaten penguin

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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