there were two cyclists cycling at a steady pace down a main road in china, one irish and the other chinese. now they happened to be cycling at exactly the same time and exactly the same pace. why did the irish cyclist get pulled over and the chinese not? because the irish cyclist had in fact brutally raped and murdered a young child in his home town and then fled the country to china.

why did the chicken cross the road? I Lied, it was a cow not a chicken and it was a highway full of speeding cars slamming into the cow body until it would stop moooooooooooooooooving...

Roses are red, My watch is gold now get on your knees and do as your told

Rebecca Black

What is brown and sticky? A stick.

Why did the plane crash? Because the pilot was a loaf of bread.

Why did the chicken cross the road? Because chicken brains are not as large or developed as human brains, therefore preventing the chicken from making a logical decision, leading to it crossing a road with heavy traffic and eventually being run over by a semi.

Why did the chicken cross the road? It just didn't.

Did you hear the joke about Hellen Kellers dad? It was very funny

why did the man fall over he was a loaf of bread

Why did the boy drop his Ice cream? A terrorist threw a refrigerator at him.

That's a rhetorical question chickens don't cross roads!

What did the hammer say to the drill? Nothing, they don't talk stupid.

Why could the woman not play the game monopoly? Because she did not own the game monopoly

What's worse than finding a small cockroach in your drink? Finding a medium sized cockroach in your drink. What's worse than finding a medium sized cockroach in your drink? Genocide. What's worse than genocide? Finding a large sized cockroach in your drink.

whats worse than your little sster being raped? her being raped by your father.

How do you finish your homework? Get your dog to eat it.

Why did the man laugh when he saw someone using a shake weight? He remembered Dane Cook's stand up preformance from the night before.

SINCE YOU ARE OBVIOUSLY READING THIS, IT WILL GET THE MOST LIKES!!!!!

Why did the black man cross the road? He had a job interview precisely 10 minutes after this event occurred.

Want to hear a joke about my penis? Nevermind it's too long.

Why didn't the boy get his sister a birthday present? Because it wasn't her birthday.

What do you get when you combine Seth Rogen and Harrison Ford? A very risky and expensive medical experiment.

I have a sandwich and chips for lunch! But instead of a sandwich I have macaroni, and instead of chips I have no friends.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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