What Makes Me Smile? Face Muscles.

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Ask me if I'm a tree... Are you a tree? No.

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What bug has eight legs? Not a spider.

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A panda bear walks into a bar. The bartender then alerts the zoo of the whereabouts of their missing panda.

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Bailey you suck at writing anti jokes quit!!!!!!!!!!! :( :( :( :( :(

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I went river dancing once. I fell in

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An Irishman, a homosexual and a Jew walk into a bar. Paddy's really exploring his options lately.

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How do you make a Plumber cry? Kill his family.

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How do you starve a blonde? You tie them up and deprive them of any food.

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Your mother is so black...because she recently suffered a horrible accident with fire and has irreparable skin damage.

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there were two cyclists cycling at a steady pace down a main road in china, one irish and the other chinese. now they happened to be cycling at exactly the same time and exactly the same pace. so why did the irish cyclist get pulled over and the chinese not? because the irish cyclist had in fact brutally raped and murdered a young child in his home town and then fled the country to china.

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Do you know the difference between a Mexican and a bench? One is a human, and one is an inanimate object.

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Roses are red, violets are blue, roses are red, violets are blue, roses are red, violets are blue, get out of the garden it's time for lunch.

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What's good about freedom of speech? Only the idea. Try saying something about Muhammed or calling a cop a power-mad taxman.

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Q: Why is my friend gay? A: Because i slept with him.

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why did the man tell a joke? to make people laugh

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What does Batman say to scare Robin? Don't make me get the bat!

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yo mama's so fat her stomach mass weighs more than people who dont have as much fat as her.

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Pen15

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Three soldiers, one Japanese, one American, and one Italian were stuck in a desert. How did they escape? A rescue squad of thirty trained troops came down in a helicopter and brought them each to their respective homes except the Italian who was actually a Mafia boss so they put him in prison.

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Q: A Jew lost a penny, a nickel, and a dime. If he found the nickel and the dime, what didn't he find? A: The Mesiah

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eloise dey.

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Why did the chicken cross the road? To get the results of his AIDS test

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You can pick your friends, you can pick your nose... But that's disgusting.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops