If no means yes and yes means no, what is yes? Yes

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A man walks into a bar. The ceiling was ringed with dozens of TV’s, much like your average sports bar. Unlike your average sports bar however, the TV’s were not featuring athletic competition. That is unless you consider vigorous and explicit gay sex between men hung like Tijuana mules to be a sport.

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Why did the bus crash? Because the driver was a watermelon.

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your mums so fat she has to use a matress as a tampon

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What's red and has a mask ? Blood, I lied about the mask.

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What's really weird? It's you Greg!

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roses are red violets are blue shut the fuck up or ill fuck you

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what do a fish and wood have in common? when they're dead, they float

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What do you call a loser on a game? A Dirty Hacker

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Women.

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A depressed gay illegal immigrant walks into a bar and the bartender asks why he's sad. The man replies "I'm the most unwanted man in America."

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Two guys walk into a bar; A Mexican and a Canadian. The Mexican guy says "Bartender, give me a 2 shots of Tequila, por favor". The Canadian guy says "Bartender, give me a shot of Club and a Molson, eh". They continue to drink until neither can feel the crippling pain of their mundane lives - then they each leave the bar, walk home and sleep alone.

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A blind man walks into a bar... And a table. And a chair.

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What did the bi-polar girl do when she found our her ex-boyfriend was living with another woman? Nothing; she was happy for their new relationship and realized life moves on, in addition to taking the appropriate amount of medicine as directed by her doctor for her condition.

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Knock Knock Who's there? A Kid With ADD A Kid With AD- Oh Look! A Squirrel!

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What's worse than having amnesia? I don't remember.

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Whos the best Jewish Cook? Hitler.

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A.how does a penguin change a light bulb? A.the same way all other penguins change a lightbulb

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What's better than winning a gold medal in the Special Olympics? Not being retarded.

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Ring. Ring. Hello? Hey, It's Sean Oh hi! How are you?

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what is cooler than writing an anti joke? killing eveybody who thinks the " my garden is on fire" joke is funny

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wuts the diference between a black guy and arab? black guy kills whitye guy arab lijkes black guy (no jews or **** thou)

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This is Jeff and I gots to take a HUGE SHIT. I bet its gonna be smelly and runny. After I wipe I'm gonna lick it and taste it. I bet it tastes GOOD. I hope it has a lil blood in it too.

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Why did the dog cross the road? He didn't, he got run over

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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