What kind of parrot can't mimic human voices? One that's just had it's vocal chords illegally harvested and sold on the black market

A rabbi walks into a bar mitzvah

Why do basketball players wear bibs? They don't.

Why can't santa fit down a chimney? No one can

Knock, Knock Who's There? (Silence) Wondering who was there, the man opened the door, to find a baby in a basket in front of him.

A chicken cross's the road it dies when a car runs it over

Q.What happens when you win a trophy? A. You don't, there is always someone better than you.

"Hey, I just met you, and this is crazy, I have Alzheimer's. "Hey, I just met you, and this is crazy, I have Alzheimer's. "Hey, I just met you, and this is crazy, I have Alzheimer's.

obama leadership

How do you kill a mocking bird. Shoot it.

Think about it: Is mexico REALLY full of: Lowrides in candy ass sparkly colors such as lip red that bounce, (manly color right? Yeah sure baggot) which contains a whole street war gang of members inside and at least twenty tons of COCAINA! ...But does not have a horn that plays "la cucaracha" Seriously, you say yes right? Hey look at this guy he said yes everybody, but ITS WROOOOOOONG CUCARACHA OR GTFO OF MEXICO! Yeah... Because Mexico is shit, id would be racist if Mexicans didn't agree...

(This is a joke made up by the young son of a friend of mine many years ago. It is still one of my favorite jokes.) Why did the bird fall out of the tree? Because it was dead.

Why was the little boy crying? Because a stranger shoved explosives up his butthole.

Person 1 What's good? Person 2 Your mom's love making

What happend to the gay kid that walked into iran. He got shot and killed ????

Why are oranges blue? Wait there orange... right

I like my women how I like my salad. Without a penis.

On a scale of 1 to drunk how ten are you?

How much moss must a Moschops chop if a Moschops must chop moss?

Your moms so poor that when she went to buy a bag of chips, she couldn't buy the bag of chips, because she didn't have enough money to buy the bag of chips

What's worse than a tornado that kills your whole whole family? Nothing.

What did the vegitarian order for dinner? Vegatables

Q. What did the man say when his car broke down. A. Damn it, my car broke down.

Whats the difference between ice cream and dead babies? I'm not eating ice cream right now.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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