Why did the gorilla fall on the ground Because it was dead

What do you call a crocodile in a dentist? I have no idea, but I'd hate to be that dentist.

What did the kid use to smell his food His nose

A black man went on the bus and sat down next to a white man. The white man looked up from his magazine and stared at the black man. They then chit-chatted and enjoyed their trip.

why did the cute baby start crying?? because its feet were eaten by rats.

How many Mexicans does it take to change a lightbulb 500 , 1 to hold the lightbulb, 499 to spin the house

Where do you find a one-legged cat? Right where you left it.

how did helen keller break her arm? reading at 100 miles per hour

What do apples and bananas have in common? They're both red (except for bananas).

Ring. Ring. Hello? Hey, It's Sean Oh hi! How are you?

Ever see a man say goodbye to a shoe? Yes, once.

There are two hippos in a bathtub, one says to the other, "pass the soap." the other hippo says, "no soap, radio."

A man walks into a bar. After several hours of drinking and loud unintellegable outbursts to those around him, the man wonders off to a nearby bus stop and relieves himself. He is now a registered sex offender.

Why was the T-Rex always sad? He couldn't clap his hands.

- kellen says to bill "your a fruit cake" - bill say to raj "your a gypsy" - raj says to kellen "you have gingevitis" R.I.P kellen 2012

Where does Osama bin Laden do his shopping? He doesn't, he's dead.

Why don't women need watches? Because they probably have a cell phone, which works just as well.

Nero, I understand, what I thought was correct, was to teach people to understand those exact words that you are conveying. Its not that, I am afraid of showing the world the man that I am. But rather that I am not a man, I admire your vision, and tried to follow it, as we got much in, common, I can think as an individual and still admire your work. But you know how society is built, if too many find out I am a woman, then that not only reveals that I have been lying to them, which I have, but also that well, women are not exactly seen as equals, I know I never was, all people ever saw in me was "a great pair of tits".

What sauce do chicken's hate? Bone suckin' sauce

What did the left nut say to the right nut? Nothing

My mom told me to shut up because I was screaming as I was strangled.

Why was the boy wearing pyjamas? It was his bed time.

Roses are Red, Violets are blue, Run Quick, Before I eat you and die of obesity due to high blood pressure and bad heart disease!!!

How did the guy feel after his wife died? Pretty shitty, I'd imagine..

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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