A:why did sam fall of the wing ? B:why ? A:she had no arms. B:... A:knock knock. B: who is there ? A:not sam

Q: What did the student say to the teacher? A: The answer is four.

Steve,Jerry and tom all go into the mens toilets, because they are men.

Chuck Norris walks into a bank. There is a long line to get to the teller. Chuck Norris waits patiently in line.

Two guys are walking down the street. One asks the other "Nice weather today, huh?" And the other responds "It sure is," and they both continue on with their days.

Ask me if I'm an orange. Are you an orange? No.

nba live 13

Why is a blonde a door knob... Because everybody gets a turn

There was a homeless man living all by his lonesome on a street corner, desperately begging for money. Suddenly, a car comes to a screeching halt and out of the window flies a thin, square piece of plastic. The hobo successfully catches it in both hands. "Whats dis?" he says, "What da hick can I do wid a stinkin wada plastic?" he says, failing to realizing the significance of the thin square of plastic, for he is but a hobo and has been out of touch with reality for quite some time. After some time, he gains back his common sense, "Aha!" he shouts, "it is but a condom!" A few days pass, the man wondering alone in search for a way to make use of his prized, plastic square. He encounters a beautiful female hobo (at least he thinks she is) and they make love. So not only does the hobo make use of the silly condom (which expired-he just doesn't know) he get's laid and keeps warm in the brutal winter weather by getting cozy with the hobo chick. There are some pros in being a hobo, you know. After a month, both hobos make the faithful decision to join their cardboard boxes together, thus creating a new home where they live happily ever after <3

So a seal walks into a club..

Think about it: Is mexico REALLY full of: Lowrides in candy ass sparkly colors such as lip red that bounce, (manly color right? Yeah sure baggot) which contains a whole street war gang of members inside and at least twenty tons of COCAINA! ...But does not have a horn that plays "la cucaracha" Seriously, you say yes right? Hey look at this guy he said yes everybody, but ITS WROOOOOOONG CUCARACHA OR GTFO OF MEXICO! Yeah... Because Mexico is shit, id would be racist if Mexicans didn't agree...

KNOCK! KNOCK! who knocks like that? all my friends break the door down...oh alright then ill answer i guess WHO IS IT? THE REAPER oh s*** dude! [panic face] NO ONES HOME? "In other news tonight, 2 local men found murdered in their living rooms, after looking up common joke style called antee joke. Police say the door was smashed in an obvious sign of forced entry. They seem to have just mysteriously had sudden heart attacks and fainted. heh heh...hey nancy....why did the chicken cross the road? [=< heh heh" "y" "because he thouroughly enjoyed darting out into traffic" "HAHAHAHAHAHAHA *GASP!* X.x dead face "NANCY! NANCY!.....well in other OTHER news ive just murdered nancy, and thats no joke." *runs*

Roses are red, Violets are blue, Barrack Obama shops at Baby Gap

what do you watch ? a tv

I once went seven years without sex, then I turned eight and my uncle raped me.

Yo sugars so salty when you put it on your french fries they taste like salty french fries

Why did Jimmy through a glass at spouse? Jimmy was an abusive husband who had a tendancy to drink too much.

An Ethiopian field worker goes into work one day and finds out he was fired. Agriculture in Ethiopia is bad because it doesn't rain much.

A man walks into a bar and says "hey bartender wanna help me out!" The bartender says "no."

Why did the old man wander into the highway? He hated his life.

A chicken cross's the road it dies when a car runs it over

Why did the monkey fall out of the tree? Because it was dead.

What did the gay man say to the deaf man? I don't know, I can't hear.

why did the little girl fall out of the tree? She didnt have any arms

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

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