What's worse than being punched in the face? Being lynched.

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A Black guy and a Mexican guy walk into the bar. The bar tender offers to buy them a round of drinks because he can tell they had a hard day at the office.

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bum sex lol

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What do you call someone who takes a toaster into their bath? Adele's number one fan.

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Whats brown and sticky? Brown glue

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why did little Hannah not like the poem "Roses are Red" because she was colorblind

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Why did the gum cross the road? It was stuck to the chickens foot.

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Roses are red Violets are penis

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Why don't they sell pharmaceuticals in the rain forest? Because it is to sparsely populated and not economically viable.

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A choir boy is hit by a car outside church. Someone runs to him and says "shall I fetch the priest?" The boy starts to mumble something but quickly loses consciousness, and later dies after 16 hours in ICU.

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What do you tell a woman with two black eyes? Nothing. You already told her twice.

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How do you kill a cow while your carrying a gun Shoot him

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Once upon a time There was an ugly barnacle He was so ugly That everyone died The end!

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Why was Michael Jackson seen shopping at Kmart? Because he heard little boys pants were 50% off the original price.

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What's mean to black people? The economy. But, I forgot to mention that it's not nice to whites, hispanics, asians or anyone else.

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A blonde sits down in first class on a flight to Miami. That's because she had a ticket for the seat.

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What's pink and wrinkley and hangs out your pj's? Ya nanna :)

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Why did the chicken cross the road. ... So he could be hit by a car.

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What does this and this have in common , wait I was meant to put pictures up, aww

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God is real

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An old bear-wrestler dies and finds himself at the pearly gates. Confused and at a loss for words due to the unfamiliar circumstance and lack of public toilets, he blurts out "Saint Peter, I presume?" but it was just the train conductor. "Ticket please." He searched his pockets and finally found the ticket. He wished he had a dog, but not a seeing-eye dog because people would assume he was blind. This story illustrates the importance of situational awareness, remembering which pocket you put your ticket in, and not forgetting to go before you leave because you don't know when you'll be able to find a restroom.

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Why did they monkey fall out of the tree? He was dead. Why did the squirrel fall out of the tree? He was stapled to the monkey. By darragh hamilton

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What did the abortion say to the womb? I'm outta here.

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What happened to the blonde pregnant women? She died giving birth to her blind and mentally challenged son.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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