Why did the chicken cross the road? Cos it wanted to.

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Roses are red Violets are blue I hate sex Especially with you

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How many cows say moo? All of them

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Larry: Why did the chick cross the road? Jeff: Chick? Don't you mean chicken? Larry: Just answer the question. Jeff: Um, why? Larry: Wrong.

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Why was the girl angry? She's PMSing. Give her a banana and stay away.

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A fat guy walks into a bar and the bartender says, "the regular?" The fat man replies, "actually this time I wanna try something different."

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What's something 9/10 people enjoy? A gang rape.

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A bear is chasing a rabbit through the woods. The rabbit stumbles into a genie while coming to a clearing. The Genie says, "I will give you both three wishes." The bear thinks quickly and says, "I wish every bear in the forest was female." The Genie then grants the wish. "And...now I wish that each bear in the country was female!" The Genie grants the wish. "AND I WISH THAT EVERY BEAR IN THE WORLD WAS FEMALE!!!" the bear exclaims, now getting overly excited by his wishes. The Genie grants the last wish and then turns to the rabbit. "Your turn." The rabbit wishes for a pair of running shoes and the well being of his family and friends. For his last wish he points at the bear and says, "I wish he was gay."

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why did the frog cross the road it was stapled to a chicken

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What the difference between water and water? Nothing, they're both water.

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Why was the woman's purse so heavy? Because it had a lot of stuff in it.

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Knock Knock? Who's There? Michael Jackson. Michael Jackson who? Shut up and give me ma dam candy women!

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Roses are red, Violets are blue. I have Tourette's, Cheese on toast.

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why was the chinese man so good at math it was his favorite subject

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how do you starve a man who is on welfare? hide his food stamps under his work boots.

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Q: Why did you fall of that swing? A: Because I'm fat.

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Why wasn't the woman cooking in the kitchen? Both her hands had been cut off in a severe conveyor belt accident.

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Electronic Arts is a respectable company.

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roses are red, violets are blue, some poems rhyme, but this one doesn't.

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Q: What do Obama and George Washington have in common? A: They are both intelligent, trustworthy presidents who truly care for what is best for the United States. Except for Obama.

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There was a black man a Spanish man and an Asian in the back of a police car. The end

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what do you call a somone who murders someone else? black.

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Q: How do all 5 gay guys walk? A: In One Direction

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Q: whats worse than getting aids? A: Giving your mom aids.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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