Why did the man stand on one foot? Because he had one leg.

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What's the difference between a plum and a bunny? They're both purple. Except the bunny.

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Knock knock. Who's there? Pete. I'm here to tell you that your entire family just died in a car accident.

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KNOCK! KNOCK! who knocks like that? seriously all my friends r jerks n break the door down...wow ur polite....um ok WHO'S THERE? THE REAPER oh sh** dude! NO ONES HOME! "in other news this evening, two local men found dead on theyre living room floors. Police say the front door was smashed in...an obvious sign of forced entry. The two men were apparently reading a webpage called anti-joke before suddenly having an unexplained heart attack and dieing....heh heh hey nancy...why did the chicken cross the road? because he thuroughly enjoyed darting out into traffic." "HAHAHAHAHAHAHHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA.......GASP! GA FA! GAA *gargle*" "wow...in other OTHER news i just killed nancy...."*runs* JOKES KILL >:}

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What did one ear say to the other ear? Did you hear that?

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Why did the little girl fail her test? Because she had mental retardation.

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Why was Bootylatrice tardy for school? -She overslept.

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Why did the chiocken cross the road? There's no such thing as a chiocken.

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Q: What did the student say to the teacher? A: The answer is four.

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A drunk is pissing on the plaza and the cop stands next to him and says, very nice. The drunk says, that's what she said. : )

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The Braves win the N.L. east

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a Black Swan walks into a bar......,,,.she then has hallucinations and imagines herself having lesbian sex with Mila Kunis...

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A man walks into a bar. While he sits on a barstool, a man greets him politely, and they proceed with light conversation.

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How many babies does it take to paint a wall? It depends on how hard you throw them

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So a black and mexican go to the foodstore to get foodstamps.the end

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Why was danielle so fat? She can't help her bad genetics

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Your Mama is so fat, when she jumped on the couch, she broke the couch.

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What's brown and sticky? Caramel.

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Roses are black, Violets are black, Everything's black, I'm Blind.

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There are two hippopotamus' in a pond cooling off from the hot day. One is named Nathaniel IV and the other Timothy. Timothy asks Nathaniel, "Nathaniel, what day is it today?" Nathaniel then replies," I believe it is Tuesday." Timothy is taken back then replies," How odd. I could've sworn it was Wednesday."

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Whas the difference between a boy going to a camp and a jewish boy going to camp? The jewish boys does not come back.

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What do you get if you cross a bulldog with a schitzu? A half breed prone to allergies and breathing problems.

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Q: What did the chinese man say to the other Chinese man? A: I don't know, I don't sneak Chinese

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What kind of parrot can't mimic human voices? One that's just had it's vocal chords illegally harvested and sold on the black market

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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