There were 3 children: Flower, Petal and Fridge. Flower asked, "Mum, why is my name Flower?" to which she replied "Because a flower was the first thing to fall on you when you were born." Petal asked, "Mum, why is my name Petal?" to which she replied "Because a petal was the first thing to fall on you when you were born." Fridge said, "Herp derp dur" to which Fridge's mother replied "Shut up, Fridge."

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What did the blonde do when she missed bus 40? She waited 30 minutes for it to come back around again.

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Why are they the "living" daylights?

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Cavan keely's the type of guy who drives past hilltown screaming GET IT THE VAN!!

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What do you call a black man with his doctorate in the field of marine biology? Doctor

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what has four legs but cant walk? a dog after A-N-A-L

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Swiggity Swooty. I'm currently in pursuit for that part of your body people refer to as "booty".

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I like apples. So does Mr. Johnson from the local fruit stand.

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Why is the fat kid laying on the ground crying? Because I hit him with a shovel

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"Hey Jeff, how are you?" "Yes."

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knock knock who's there Alec Baldwin I just raped your children ..........

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How much wood could a wood chuck chuck if a wood chuck could chuck wood?.....Why the **** do you care?

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Why did the Jewish boy grab his groin? Because he was just circumcised.

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How many fools does it take to change a light bulb? A lot.

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Whats yellow and cant swim? a bulldozer

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Michal j. fox has Parkinsons disease. He is tired of losing at jenga

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What do you call red eyes in the dark? A high black man

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Why didn't little billy have any friends? Billy bought a rifle, and shot everyone he had ever seen or talked to, even his family. Billy then tripped on his walk home and fell off a bridge, and into the ocean. Then a shark came and swallowed him. That is why you should never kill your friends and family because it will come back and bite you. Don't be like billy

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What does rainbow stand for? Rick Astley Is Nesting By Our Window to harass us

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I enjoy vagina. While you enjoy penis in your mouth. Just remember God hates fags. :)

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What do you call a prison inmate with no arms or legs? John. That's his name.

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if u like this i wont pay you a dollar

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Knock, Knock Who's There A dyslexic kid with aides

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Whats worse then any minority? inter-minority breeding.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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