Q: Do you know what really makes me smile? A: Facial Muscles.

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What's worse than being held hostage? Waking up and finding dick your mouth

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There were 3 children: Flower, Petal and Fridge. Flower asked, "Mum, why is my name Flower?" to which she replied "Because a flower was the first thing to fall on you when you were born." Petal asked, "Mum, why is my name Petal?" to which she replied "Because a petal was the first thing to fall on you when you were born." Fridge said, "Herp derp dur" to which Fridge's mother replied "Shut up, Fridge."

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Knock knock, Who's there? To get to the other side

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Why did the Jewish boy grab his groin? Because he was just circumcised.

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How much wood could a wood chuck chuck if a wood chuck could chuck wood?.....Why the **** do you care?

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How many fools does it take to change a light bulb? A lot.

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I like apples. So does Mr. Johnson from the local fruit stand.

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knock knock who's there Alec Baldwin I just raped your children ..........

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"Hey Jeff, how are you?" "Yes."

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Why is the fat kid laying on the ground crying? Because I hit him with a shovel

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Whats yellow and cant swim? a bulldozer

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Michal j. fox has Parkinsons disease. He is tired of losing at jenga

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I got shot once it hurt a lot

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What does rainbow stand for? Rick Astley Is Nesting By Our Window to harass us

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What do you call red eyes in the dark? A high black man

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Why didn't little billy have any friends? Billy bought a rifle, and shot everyone he had ever seen or talked to, even his family. Billy then tripped on his walk home and fell off a bridge, and into the ocean. Then a shark came and swallowed him. That is why you should never kill your friends and family because it will come back and bite you. Don't be like billy

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Whats worse then any minority? inter-minority breeding.

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How do you make Lady Gaga cry? Poke her face? No slap her bum!

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Person 1: You know whats funny? Person 2: No! What? Person 1: A joke!

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Knock, Knock Who's There A dyslexic kid with aides

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if u like this i wont pay you a dollar

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I enjoy vagina. While you enjoy penis in your mouth. Just remember God hates fags. :)

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Why did the girl get hit by the bus. Because she was Helen Keller

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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