how do you get a baby to stop swinging from a fan whack it with a shovel

whats worse than 10 dead babies in my garage? 11 dead babies in my garage

Knock Knock Who's There? Just open the damn door I forgot my key and I really need to pee

Why was 6 afraid of 7? Because 7 murdered 4 and 5 then raped 10

Why did the chicken cross the road? Well, it was Friday night (or Halloween or St. Patty's Day) and the chicken was at a party. He got totally drunk, and then got the bright idea that it would be okay to drive home. On a rural two-lane highway, his vehicle careened into the oncoming traffic lane, and then the ditch, thus crossing the road. Fortunately, he walked away with only a few scratches. However, he was cited for wreckless driving, and got a DUI as well.

What starts with 's' and ends in 'ex'? S.e.x -XH

Cold camel scrotum.

Q: why was the cow in the middle of the road? A: because it was dead

Why do jewish women like to get their sons circumcised? They like anything 25% off.

A rabbi walks into a bar mitzvah

whats worse than 9/11? 9/12

An Asian teenager bought his first gun, and proceeded to go hunting with his father in the wilderness.

Q-What happened to the kid who thought he could fly A-his head exploded while he was sitting in a microwave

Why was the girl stupid? She didn't pay attention in school because everyone was making fun of her blonde hair.

If I was a regular squirrel, I would be pissed at flying squirrels.

Do you know what's not right? Left.

What's the square root of 69? 8.3

A homeless guy walked up to me and said "Any change?", to which I replied, "Nope, your still homeless". We laughed and laughed. The he stabbed me.

i was going to say a gay joke butt f*** it.

What did the boy with no arms or legs get for Christmas? A bike with no handle bars or pedals.

-What do you call the brown spots in your yard? Dog shit.

What would Guy and Hemech's reactions be if they saw this joke up? They would see it from the newest jokes

Whats hotter than a sunny day. A pot of boiling water.

Roses are red Roses are pink Roses are yellow Roses are white Stop stereotyping roses, already.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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