Q: What is the difference between everything and nothing? A: everything! Moral: NOTHING!

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Why can't santa fit down a chimney? No one can

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Why is it incorrect that the universe will end in 2012? Because profound idiocy doesn't always occur.

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Roses are red Violets are blue I'm dyslexic couldn't tell, could you?

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Roses are red, violets are blue. Grass is green.

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javascript:alert("your own");

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A: Wanna hear a joke? Womens rights B: Wanna hear another joke? Your sexist beliefs are why your single...

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A man walks into the doctor's office and says, "Doc, every time I drink coffee, my eye hurts". The Doctor then tells him, "You have an infection called conjunctivitis, also known as pinkeye"

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a dyslexic man came on this website thinking it was made by his aunt Tina keoj he was sadly mistaken. it was just a bunch of jokes about dyslexic men going into bars

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What's the difference between Justin Bieber and a gay guy? They're both gay

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There were two muffins in an oven one muffin said, "Is it hot in here or is it just me?" the other muffin said, "AHHH A TALKING MUFFIN!"

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knock knock whos there? the police, your under arrest

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a blind man walks across a road. he's dead

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A moose walks into a corner store and asks the lady where the Mashed potatoes are. The lady working behind the corner says "Down Aisle five..." The moose goes down aisle five and there are no Mashed Potatoes. -Tyler the Creator

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Your mom is so fat that she enjoys junk food regularly.

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A dog goes to his food bowl. He eats his dinner.

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Wanna hear a funny joke? Look at the last joke.

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Why did the monkey fall out of the tree? Because it was dead. Why did a second monkey fall out of the tree? Because it was stapled to the first monkey. Why did a third monkey fall out of the tree? Peer pressure.

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Why was the black man a victim of racial prejudice? because he was black

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why did the baby start crying? someone threw a brick at it

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Where did Ellen go after the explosion? Everywhere

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What do you call a snake with no arms? Normal. What do you call an amphibian with no arms? A caecilian. What do you call a girl with no arms? A poor, poor soul that is unfortunate enough to have had an amputation when young. Now, she can't go in public without being stared at. She can't catch herself when she trips. She can't ride a bike, bake cookies for her family, or be a NASA astronaut like she always dreamed. She is the normal ASDF Movie character.

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Why did the monkey fall out of the tree He had no limbs

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Q: What did the student say to the teacher? A: The answer is four.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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