What do you a call a guy on steroids? A Body Builder

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What happened when the lawyer pissed all over the judge? He was thrown off the case, causing him to go home, rape his wife, and put a bullet into his child's head.

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Why did the monkey fall out of the tree? Because it was dead.

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There are three types of people in this world: The stupid. And the ones that can't count.

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I walked into a bar and it hurt because it was metal

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who steals more than a black person?, a pirate.

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GAME OVER!!!!!! OF COURSE!!!!!! I BEHELD AS SATAN FELL FROM THE SKY..: LIKE LIGHTNIIIIIIIIIIIING! Street Fighter 2: The (antijoke) Movie. Moral: Raul Julia, you are the man, rest in peace dude you made that movie a masterpiece, do not give this a thumbs up for me, but for the most brilliant performance he ever gave.

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What do you call a snake with no arms? Normal. What do you call an amphibian with no arms? A caecilian. What do you call a girl with no arms? A poor, poor soul that is unfortunate enough to have had an amputation when young. Now, she can't go in public without being stared at. She can't catch herself when she trips. She can't ride a bike, bake cookies for her family, or be a NASA astronaut like she always dreamed. She is the normal ASDF Movie character.

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The graduate with a Science degree asks, "Why does it work?" The graduate with an Engineering degree asks, "How does it work?" The graduate with an Accounting degree asks, "How much will it cost?" The graduate with a Liberal Arts degree asks, "Do you want fries with that?"

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Knock knock. Nobody answers because the homeowner was out of the house at the time.

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It's Adam and Eve, not Steve and Eve!

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How to do you kill a blonde? Various methods, most effective of which is firing squad

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What do a jew and a black have in common? God hates both of them

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Guy: If you can guess what's in my hand, you can have it. Girl: If it fits in one hand, you can keep it!

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Did you know Hellen Keller had a swing set? No? Well neither did she.

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An Englishman, an Irishman and a Scotsman walk into a bar. They have trouble understanding each other.

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q: why do mens testicles hang? a: so woman can kick us in em

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What do you call a person with no life. Dead.

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A black guy walks into a dilapidated house and purchases large amounts of narcotics. Racism isn't funny.

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you were my brotha, from another motha, you touch my girl, ill leave you dead in the gutta.

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Get in the Batmobile.

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It was just Michael J. Fox's birthday I wonder if he got in trouble for shaking his presents.

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Q: Who are the fastest readers? A: 9/11 jumpers 200 stories in 5 seconds

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two biscuits rolling down a hill one says, " where you from" the other replied "im not telling you, youl steal my washing"

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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