You mamma so fat, she should consider going on a diet.

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whats the diffrence between love and faling in love when u love some one your not falling

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how many prostitutes does it take to fix a lightbulb? it depends how much you pay them

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Why did the little kid use pillows at night? Because he was constipated.

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Contrary to popular statement, "When life hands you lemons, make lemonade," you technically can't do this because of the need for water and sugar to make lemonade. Secondly, life can't technically hand you lemons because life isn't a physical thing that can hand you lemons. So really, you don't even have to worry about the second two ingredients.

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Follow the Yellow brick road, follow the yellow brick road........except it's not yellow.

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I work for a Jewish Carpenter. He pays me minimum wage.

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Gestapo.

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Haikus are easy, But sometimes they don't make sense. Refrigerator.

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A man walks into the market. He asks a young attractive employee in a smooth voice, "Do you have any honey here, baby?" The employee responds, "No sir. I'm sorry."

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Fire extinguishers are sexy.

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A man is talking nonsense at a wall when another man walks up to him. "Why are you talking at a wall?" "I'm trying to appease the mighty wall god Kaleothayrhonka." "Cool, let me join you!" And they both talk at the wall for hours on end because they are stupid that way.

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What is the Civil War called in Virginia? The War of Northern Aggression.

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Yo' momma is like a hardware store, 25 cents for a screw!

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Why was the skeleton afraid to cross the road? He wasn't, and in fact was entirely unaware that said road existed given the fact that he was deceased; and therefore lacked any sensory organs and motor functions associated with crossing roads.

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Where did the Welsh man work? At an office complex.

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What did the virulent Homophobe do during the PRIDE national day of silence? He talked

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What do you call a dog that's half poodle, half bulldog? A dog.

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Why don't blind men skydive? Because it would be unwise for a man who can't see to be jumping out of planes, completely unaware of his surroundings.

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I used to be an inventor, but I had other ideas.

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What do you call a pakistani with a backpack on a plane? A passenger with ordinary hand luggage

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why are you adopted? cause no one loved you.

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What do you call a blind, crippled, child? Unlucky.

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Not Steve Jobs

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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