On a scale of 1 to Chris Brown, how mad would you be if i ate your golfish? Very angry, as my goldfish is not food.

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Why can't Helen Keller drive? Because she's dead

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What did one lawyer say to the other lawyer? A= Were both lawyers! What happens every sixty seconds in the us? A= a minute passes!

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JESUS SAYS PICTURE HERE ..... Throws a party for 12 people the world still talks about 2012 years latter !

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A man walks into a bar and says, "Ow."

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An asian loses to you in starcraft..

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Roses are red, Violets are red, Trees are red, HOLY SHIT MY GARDEN'S ON FIRE

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How do you have sex with hellen keller? Very sweetly

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"Why is Barney green and purple?" "Because the producers of the show decided to make him that way."

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What did the cow say to the chicken? Moo

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How many licks does it take to got to the Tootsie Roll center of a Tootsie Pop? 357

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Why was the skeleton afraid to cross the road? He wasn't, and in fact was entirely unaware that said road existed given the fact that he was deceased; and therefore lacked any sensory organs and motor functions associated with crossing roads.

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What's the difference between a Lamborghini and a pile of dead babies? I don't have a Lamborghini in my garage

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Where's my tractor?

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why did the chicken cross the road? it was in my sandwich and i'm late for class.

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Amy Winehouse has been sober for 2 weeks now.

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What ruined the little boy's day? He drowned.

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theres a mexican, an asian, and an american in a plane, they're about to crash, so they all have to throw out something they have a lot of in their country. The Mexican throws out beans, and says "I have to many of these in my country." The Asian throws out rice and says "i have to many of these in my country." The American throws out the Mexican and says "I have to many of these in my country."

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Christopher Reeve walks into a bar.

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Why did the chicken cross the road? Segregation

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a black guy leaves prison

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What's clear and wet? water

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Why was little Timmy an orphan? His family were slaughtered when he was three.

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roses are red violets are blue shut the fuck up or ill fuck you

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops