The duck says do you smell poop. Ya says the chicken, it wasn't me It was the turkey

Why doesn't Gary like me? Because I killed his family and fed them to him.

Roses are red, violets are blue. Grass is green.

What did the cat say to the dog? "Meow."

how much is a microwave full of dead babies? a fridge full of dead puppies.

Your mamas so fat. She fat.

What is worse than a bus falling on you? A bus with Mama June inside it falling on you.

Some dude and his son are driving to school. They get into a car accident so the have to go the the hospital. But when the doctor comes in, the doctor says "I can't oporate on this boy! He's my son!" Who's the doctor? His Mom.

Q. Why was the dad sad? A.His favorite team lost in the championship.

What did the rabbit say to the rabbi? ...RABBITS DO NOT TALK! So then the rabbi said, "In that case you must be a hare!"

Cleveland winning something

Waseem is not a funny guy!

p p p penis. penis's are big and juicy

Poop

Why couldn't the little pirate see the movie? His dad had just died in a freak accident on the boat. He was going to the funeral that day. Life as a pirate isn't at all as it seems. Little Jimmy the pirate, had nothing. He had no family. His mother dead already, his sister and brother refusing to speak to him because he ran off to be a pirate with his father. Clearly, he had no idea what he was getting into, because his father was gone. What was he to do now? He had no one to go to. The ship mates were all either completly insane or never sober. That very night, Jimmy took the pistol off the ship captian and shot himself point blank in the head. Little Jimmy is in a better place now. With his mother and father. In a place where he cant be harmed any more. I miss you Jim <3. ~ Jack Sullivan

why is black such a deprssing color because it symbolizes death

Why do Jews make sure their cars can stop on a dime? So if something happens unexpectedly when they are driving they have a better chance of avoiding a dangerous collision.

Why is it hot outside? Because God made it so.

whats better than 24................. 25

Chuck Norris walks into a bar. Everybody leaves except Michael Jackson. Michael Jackson never walked out alive

I've got a shotgun with two bullets. I've got two enemies. What do I do with the gun? Go bird hunting.

Why do they call it a clock radio?... because it's both.

Your mom is so fat that she is fat.

Why didn't the monkey fall out of the tree when someone threw a refrigerator at it? Because it was already lying on the floor dying of AIDS.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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