John - hey do you have tickets to see Oasis? Sam - No I bought green day tickets intead. John rolls his eyes at sam very dissapointedly then proceeds to go home. The next day Sam phones John excitedly telling him he traded his Green day tickets for Oasis tickets, a smile appears on Johns and Sams faces, not that they can see each other, they both then put the phone down. An African died. Green Day are a bad band.

3 penguins meet each other in penguin #1's backyard for a pool party. The first penguin climbs up the steps of the water slide gets to the top, looks around and then slides down the slide *SPLASH* The second penguin climbs up the steps, looks around then slides down the slide *SPLASH* The third penguin hastily climbs the steps and slides down the slide radio -Soulbroker

a horse walks into a bar, the bartender says: why the long face? he has cancer

Why do women get pregnant? Beacuse it hurts and they deserve it.

What's better than winning the special Olympics? Not being retarded.

Mr Webb *Hit keyboard loudly* -...

A wealthy businessman gets into an elevator with a poor, ragged janitor. They take the elevator up 19 floors. As the businessman leaves the elevator, he turns to the janitor and says, "Good day to you, sir."

What happen to Teenage Mutain ninja turtals? Go Ninja Go.

What did one musician say to the other? "We should have gone to college."

Why Did The Chicken Cross The Road To Get To The Other Side

knock knock, whos there? the repo man.

A blonde, brunette and a redhead are taken captive by a native tribe. They didn't survive the encounter.

is your refrigerator running? yeah oh, ok. just making sure your food doesn't spoil

How many dead babies can you fit in the trunk of a car? Depends on how much you compress them.

A man named Cecil walks into a bar. He then orders a drink.

Your mum so fat, she died of a heart attack

who has no significant other or personal life? who ever is on anti-joke.com

How big is kevins Dick? Idk ask his mom!

what do lions and potatoes have in common? They each drive a sports car, wait neither the lion nor the potato drive a sports car. Sorry to waste your time with this joke that seemed to not really have a meaning or a clever punchline.

A guy went to a haunted house on Friday the thirteenth… it gave him a small fright and he continued on with his day

sooo.how do you get a bonner when your in a room with lady gaga???? you tell lady gaga to turn around and you think of brittany spears bending over get it nahhh probably not

whats harder than watching a dog get hit by a bus? my boner..

What did the unappreciated YTPer say in the comment section of Nyan Cat? "PLEASE CHECK OUT MY YTP'S! I'M BEGGING YOU! YOU DON'T LOVE ME!!! WHY?!!! Q_Q"

knock knock who's there? a murder who? a murder who kills you and your family.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...