If Jimmy has 50 pieces of candy and eats 40 of them, what does he have now? Jimmy has diabetes.

theres a mexican, an asian, and an american in a plane, they're about to crash, so they all have to throw out something they have a lot of in their country. The Mexican throws out beans, and says "I have to many of these in my country." The Asian throws out rice and says "i have to many of these in my country." The American throws out the Mexican and says "I have to many of these in my country."

If your South American in the kitchen, what are you in the bathroom? European ( your a pee an)

Why did the chicken cross the road? It didn't. It was taken to a factory where it was butchered, processed and eventually fed to America.

Hickory Dickory Dock mother is a whore

What do you call a man with no arms or legs after he got into a fight with his cat? You call him by his name and apologize for leaving catnip on his head.

why did the stupid blonde run straight into oncoming traffic? because there was a small child there that could have been seriously injured.

Q: why did the little girl cry on Christmas? A: because she got a dead cat.

Knock Knock! Who's There? Not Steve Jobs.

How is it called a black man piloting a plane? Pilot, you racist!

i have a white dog on my and have the strangest boner

whats funnier than drews nose .... ??

What did the poor guy get for christmas? The homeless guy.

What did the robot say to the centipede? STOP BEING A CENTIPEDE!!!! It's funny cause the robot ain't got no arms.

why?

why did the baby cross the road? because it was stapled to the chicken -written by sion dafydd jones, uk

What is another word for a woman that ends in unt. Aunt.

how many prostitutes does it take to fix a lightbulb? it depends how much you pay them

roses are red violets are blue shut the fuck up or ill fuck you

why did the black boy fall? he had terminal cancer and couldnt stand the pain anymore he died

What do you get when you cross a lion with a rhinoceros? A trip to the hospital and animal cruelty charges.

what do you call a room full of one terrorist and several babies? dead babies

Why couldn't the pirate get into the adult movie? He had just spent the last of his money at Ihop with his friends, and is now regretting ordering two Rooty Tooty Fresh and Fruitys when he was really only hungry for one.

How did the black kid drop out of highschool? He got bad grades.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...