a man walks into a bar it hurt

Why does Michael Jackson have difficulty playing chess? Because he's dead, and if there is an afterlife, we don't actually have the ability to know that it is possible to play chess there.

Meow.

How do you mess with Helen Keller? Move all the furniture in her room.

Q: Why did the plane crash into a mountain? A: The pilot was a tomato.

Why did the chicken cross the road? It's coop was faulty and thus it escaped.

Why did the chicken cross the road? It had the utmost desire to.

Y did a fat woman cross the rode? To get to McDonalds

Murder me once, shame on you.

What's a skateboard without wheels A snowboard

What's funnier than somebody spitting in someone else's food? It's not even funny, it's just plain rude and disgusting.

As if it helps your self esteem: Nothing yet, Be the first to comment.

Roses are red, Violets at blue. My mind is twisted, Bend over bitch your about to get fisted.

What did the one lawyer say to the other lawyer? We are both lawyers!!

John has 38 candy bars. He eats 28. What does he have now? Diabetes. John has Diabetes.

whats worse than the holocaust? 2 holocausts

A muslim walked into a bar. Then he walked out because he had made a wrong turn.

What is worse than adolf hitler? Justin beiber

Whats the difference between football and basketball? Absolutely everything By darragh Hamilton

hey what are you eating there? a giant scorpion that tried to rape me.

If a tree falls in the forest does a woman hear it? Probably, but the real question is why is there a tree in the kitchen?

Dancing Potatoe!

Q;what do you call a fish with two knees and personally HANDS out JOBS A: a blowfish

What's red, loose, and easy to wear? A rock. I lie about everything.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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