There was a homeless man living all by his lonesome on a street corner, desperately begging for money. Suddenly, a car comes to a screeching halt and out of the window flies a thin, square piece of plastic. The hobo successfully catches it in both hands. "Whats dis?" he says, "What da hick can I do wid a stinkin wada plastic?" he says, failing to realizing the significance of the thin square of plastic, for he is but a hobo and has been out of touch with reality for quite some time. After some time, he gains back his common sense, "Aha!" he shouts, "it is but a condom!" A few days pass, the man wondering alone in search for a way to make use of his prized, plastic square. He encounters a beautiful female hobo (at least he thinks she is) and they make love. So not only does the hobo make use of the silly condom (which expired-he just doesn't know) he get's laid and keeps warm in the brutal winter weather by getting cozy with the hobo chick. There are some pros in being a hobo, you know. After a month, both hobos make the faithful decision to join their cardboard boxes together, thus creating a new home where they live happily ever after <3

thumb_up thumb_down +37

Why did Jenny fail her photography class? Because Jenny has epilepsy and she had a coma while taking the final exam? To this day Jenny is drain dead in the hospital.

thumb_up thumb_down +37

Tommy has no arms and legs. What did he get for Christmas? Cancer

thumb_up thumb_down +35

What did Liberia say to Texas? Tag, you're it!

thumb_up thumb_down +35

What did the girl say to the boy? I don't know it was a private conversation

thumb_up thumb_down +35

What's worse than 20 babies stapled to one tree? Getting life imprisonment after...

thumb_up thumb_down +33

What's the best part of having a doctor for a best friend? The sex.

thumb_up thumb_down +33

What do you call 200 black men jumping from a plane? Night

thumb_up thumb_down +33

How do you get a giraffe in a fridge? Open the Door, put the giraffe in, close the door How do you get an elephant in a fridge Open the door, take the giraffe out, put the elephant in, close the door There is an animal meeting, one animal doesn't show up. Which animal didn't come? The Elephant, it's still in the fridge You come across a crocodile infested river, how do you get across? You swim across, the crocodiles are at the meeting, Weren't you listening?

thumb_up thumb_down +33

if a kayak was stuck in a tree with its headlights on, how many pancakes stacked will it take to get to the moon? none because snakes dont have armpits

thumb_up thumb_down +33

whats worse than 10 dead babies in my garage? 11 dead babies in my garage

thumb_up thumb_down +31

What did the rabbit say to the rabbi? ...RABBITS DO NOT TALK! So then the rabbi said, "In that case you must be a hare!"

thumb_up thumb_down +31

What's the difference between Justin Bieber and a gay guy? They're both gay

thumb_up thumb_down +31

How is butter and your mom similar? They both consist of much fat.

thumb_up thumb_down +31

how many blondes does it take to change a lightbulb? one and a ladder

thumb_up thumb_down +29

Person1: Why did the chicken cross the road? Person2: I dunno.-. to get to the other side? Person1: :( I dream of a better tomorrow where a chicken can cross the street without having his motives questioned

thumb_up thumb_down +29

What if I told you that our role our "little team" is not as little as you think?

thumb_up thumb_down +29

Two scientists walk into a bar. The first scientist says, "I'll have some H2O." The second scientist says, "I'll have H2O too." The bartender gives them both water, realizing that H2O2 is poisonous and that the second scientist must have simple worded his request poorly.

thumb_up thumb_down +29

Larry stopped by today to drop of a package. The package was a bomb. So I gave the "gift" to my neighbor for her birthday. My Mom is my neighbor.

thumb_up thumb_down +29

What do you call a mexican hopping over fences - A parkour Artist

thumb_up thumb_down +29

hey guys check out my cool youtube video at https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=ivQ_bezJjK0

thumb_up thumb_down +29

i hate it when Voldemort showers in my nutella

thumb_up thumb_down +29

Whats worse than finding a worm in your apple? Getting cancer from a horse.

thumb_up thumb_down +29

Gadaffi

thumb_up thumb_down +29

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...


Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops