Knock knock. Who's there? Black guy. Due to your skin tone I feel you may cause potential danger to me and my family, so for that reason I will not allow you to enter my home.

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A baby seal walks into a club. I happens to be that the club is having their bi-annual PETA meeting, and the baby seal is chosen as the organization's new mascot. After touring the nation and meeting important world leaders, the baby seal still wonders why there was a club at the North Pole.

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Why did the plane crash? -Because the pilot was a loaf of bread.

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Do you know what they say? Words

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Q: Where does a hooker go for her footlong? A: Subway

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A duck walks into a bar, and the bartender says "what'll it be?" The bartender is then sent to a medical clinic after letting several wild animals into his bar and proceeding to feed them alcoholic drinks. He is diagnosed with schizophrenia.

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I have glasses but cannot see I have feet but cannot walk What am I? A riddle.

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Q:Why did the black man shoot the white man? A:The black man happened to be extremely good at paintball.

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what did the man see in the mirror? Nothing, he was blind.

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If life throws you melons you might be dyslexic, but you also might not be.

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Ask me if i am a tree are you a tree? no

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The priest, rabbi and Lady Gaga walk into a bar. Lady Gaga performs on stage, while the priest and rabbi listen.

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Nobody cares.

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Q: What is black, white, and red all over? A: A white wall with black and red paint just added onto it recently.

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Q: How does 5 gay people walk together? A: In One Direction.

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The Irish man was sober.

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12

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What's the difference between video games and a naked chick? The Holocaust.

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What is the difference between Michael Jackson and Neil Armstrong? Neil Armstrong was the first man to walk on the moon, and Michael Jackson molested boys.

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Potato.

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What is the square root of 69? 8.30662386

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How heavy duty are your nachos? No, because babies simply cannot swallow blenders.

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Have you ever noticed that when geese fly in a V, one side is long than the other? Do you know why that is? There are more geese on that side

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What do you call a guy being followed by about 30 others with high powered rifles? A military general serving for his country.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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