You mamma so fat, she should consider going on a diet.

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What type of ruler lies? A shatter resistant one

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Knock knock whos there punctuation

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Three blondes walk into a community college.

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There were 3 children: Flower, Petal and Fridge. Flower asked, "Mum, why is my name Flower?" to which she replied "Because a flower was the first thing to fall on you when you were born." Petal asked, "Mum, why is my name Petal?" to which she replied "Because a petal was the first thing to fall on you when you were born." Fridge said, "Herp derp dur" to which Fridge's mother replied "Shut up, Fridge."

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Why did the milkman die? Because everyone dies.

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Congratulations, sir. The judge has determined that the charges of traffic violation against you were indeed incorrect, and you will be given a large sum of cash for your wasted time.

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Why cant little billy jump? He was aborted.

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Person 1: Knock Knock Person 2: Who's there? Person 1: Knock Knock Person 2: Who's there? Person 1: Knock Knock Person 2: Who's there? Person 1: A deaf guy

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Why did the white guy feel awkward at the black people convention? He didn't know anyone there

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What did the baby get for its 1st birthday? Nothing it was aborted.

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Communism, Capitalism and an Irish man walk into a bar. Communism says, “I’ll buy the drinks but I require your complete obedient consent.” Capitalism says, “No I’ll buy the drinks but I require that you pay me back with interest” and the Irish man says “No I… I don’t feel very well at all… Oh shite I’ve got the bloody runs!” He then proceeds to shit myself.

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What's worse than a rainy day? Dropping the soap

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I did your mom..... A favor..... By making you..... A sandwich...... With mustard.....

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Q: What did the anorexic girl do for thanksgiving? A: Nothing, she was paralyzed from a fall 2 days prior and nobody had found her yet.

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Knock Knock Who's there I have Alzheimer's I have Alzheimer's who? Knock Knock

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A jew, a catholic and an atheist are in the desert. They see a dusty lamp. They take it and rub it. Once the lamp is clean, they put it back on the sand and kep walking.

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Why shouldn't you download music? Various reasons.

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why is liam baldy because his dad is too

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A. Your mamma is so stuiped she starved to death in a grocary store.

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What's bigger than the Loch Ness Monster? Loch Ness.

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What is the Civil War called in Virginia? The War of Northern Aggression.

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There was a car crash in Mexico, 78 people were announced dead.

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Knock knock. Who's there? Interrupting doctor. Interrupting doct- You have cancer.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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