Knock Knock? Who's there? Look in the peephole

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Nero, I understand, what I thought was correct, was to teach people to understand those exact words that you are conveying. Its not that, I am afraid of showing the world the man that I am. But rather that I am not a man, I admire your vision, and tried to follow it, as we got much in, common, I can think as an individual and still admire your work. But you know how society is built, if too many find out I am a woman, then that not only reveals that I have been lying to them, which I have, but also that well, women are not exactly seen as equals, I know I never was, all people ever saw in me was "a great pair of tits".

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A horse walks into a bar and the bartender says .... Hey, you shouldn't be in here; you're a big and powerful animal and any sudden movement could be dangerous for anyone around you. You have sharp hooves and we don't carry anything ergonomically designed for you to actually drink out of ... so, it's probably best that you just go ahead and get out of here. The irishman at the bar says to the bartender: Why are you talking to a horse as if it can understand you? They do not understand the spoken word and do not have the vocal chords to reply.

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What's worse than a truckload of dead babies? Wait a week.

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Whats black and has wheels a black man i lied about the wheels

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What time is it when grandpa sits ontop of a telephone pole and throws pineapples at people? Time to go to a nursing home

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What should you do when your refrigerator is running? Tell it to FREEZE!

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[] i have read and agree to the terms of service Nope

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Roses are red, Violets are blue, get in my bed so i can fu** you!

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YOLO

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A Priest and A Rabbi Walk Into The Bar. Ouch.

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hi

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Yo mama so fat!... we are very concerned for her health.

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Why did the elephant cross the road? It's an elephant. Who's going to stop it?

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A duckling is following its mother, but gets separated. Noticing that her child is lost the mother duck calls out, and the duckling finds her quickly.

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If you give a mouse a cookie... ...you're destroying its natural diet. It might die.

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A Japanese woman walks into a Korean deli, and asks the Korean man if she can buy some groceries. They are able to get past their cultural differences, and share their favorite recipes.

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two men are having a conversation a third man walks what does he do? patiently waits as to not seem rude.

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Yo momma so hot she won a beauty contest and was later shot and killed by the jealous losers

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man 1 walks by man 2 man 1 says hey buddy whats up man 2 responds do i know you man 1 says no but i saw seeing a movie on friday man 2 says oh cool but wasnt that movie great man 1 responds ya and man 1 and man 2 become best friends plus man 1 only liked man 2 because he was rich!!!

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Woman: If you were my husband, I've give you poisoned wine. Winston Churchill: Madame, if you were my wife, I would hope we could have enough love to attempt marriage counseling so as to work out these issues.

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What is the difference between a doorknob? Toast.

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A man walks into a bar. He sits down and orders a drink from the bartender. The bartender gets it for him and says "Here you go." The man then says "Thank you." The man then starts to drink his drink, and appreciates the fine quality of the drink. Afterwards, he finishes the drink, and decides to leave the bar and go home.

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Q: What's black and blue and hates sex? A: The 8-year-old boy tied up in my garage.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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