Why did the man take off all his clothes? He was going to take a shower.

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Q:Why did the booger cross the street? A:Because everyone was picking on him

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knock knock 'who's there?' 'just open the door'

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Knock knock Who's there? An elf. An elf who? An elf who wants to be a dentist.

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According to astronomy, when you wish upon a star, you're actually a few million years late. That star is dead. Just like your dreams.

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There's no "i" in tim.

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Why did the boy eat his homework? Because he already ate his dog.

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The doctor comes out of the room and tells the new parents that there is good news and bad news. The couple says they want to hear the bad news first. The doctor says "your baby is black." The couple then ask "what is the good news?", the doctor replies "your baby is dead."

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What's the color of a retarde dogs hair? 69

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Why did the chicken cross the road? To get to the other side... But he got hit by a car instead, Life is full of disappointments

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Roses are Red Violets are Blue I have five fingers and one of then is poking at you

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Whats red and smells like blue paint? Red paint.

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Whats worse than the holocaust? Being a jew in the Holocaust.

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"Why did the chicken cross the-" "Gosh! Why can't we just live in a world where a chicken can simply cross the road without being questioned about it's motives?!?!" ~McKenna<3

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why did the baby bird fall out of the nest? while the mother bird was away a cat knocked over the nest. needless to say the baby bird died.

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Q: What's worse than 10 dead babies in a tree? A: I'm sure there are lots of things.

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Hgiugsf s8dyfgc sdyhgd©•øˆ????ª•†®???ßßs cdiug dvyg 34t5 fd87 vrry utgg erug 46 5gtyrue fVTU? Tree.

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Why was 6 afraid of 7? Becuse 7 was a convicted serial killer. >----->

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There was a homeless man living all by his lonesome on a street corner, desperately begging for money. Suddenly, a car comes to a screeching halt and out of the window flies a thin, square piece of plastic. The hobo successfully catches it in both hands. "Whats dis?" he says, "What da hick can I do wid a stinkin wada plastic?" he says, failing to realizing the significance of the thin square of plastic, for he is but a hobo and has been out of touch with reality for quite some time. After some time, he gains back his common sense, "Aha!" he shouts, "it is but a condom!" A few days pass, the man wondering alone in search for a way to make use of his prized, plastic square. He encounters a beautiful female hobo (at least he thinks she is) and they make love. So not only does the hobo make use of the silly condom (which expired-he just doesn't know) he get's laid and keeps warm in the brutal winter weather by getting cozy with the hobo chick. There are some pros in being a hobo, you know. After a month, both hobos make the faithful decision to join their cardboard boxes together, thus creating a new home where they live happily ever after <3

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Why did the chicken cross the road? He was suicidal.

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A Mexican walks into a club.

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What did Liberia say to Texas? Tag, you're it!

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What's the best part of having a doctor for a best friend? The sex.

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if a kayak was stuck in a tree with its headlights on, how many pancakes stacked will it take to get to the moon? none because snakes dont have armpits

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops